growing and learning

confessions of a "world-is-ending nutcase"

08:03 AM, Saturday, December 20, 2008 .. 3 comments .. Link

Sometimes I feel like an extremist. A world-is-ending nutcase. A conspiracy-theory-believing wacko. No, let me rephrase that. Sometimes I feel like other people think I am an extremist. A world-is-ending nutcase. A conspiracy-theory-believing wacko.
I have a year's supply of food in my basement. Not too strange around here where the dominant religion has encouraged such a move for the past 70 years or so. Not that people do it. It is kind of a “Yeah, we are supposed to, but where would I put it? How would I use it? We don't like rice/beans/powdered milk, so I am not buying any. It is too expensive.” So even in Utah, I am a bit weird. In fact, it causes a bit of a different problem when sisters in the church find out: “oh, wow, you must be so on top of things/diligent and you homeschool!” Kind of like I am Super-Mom; which attitude I really dislike!
I make my own soap, for three main reasons – one is a “wacko” reason. One: I like it on my skin better. Two: I like knowing what is in a product with which I coat my skin – the largest organ of the body! and Three: I like knowing how to do it – in history, soap has been a precious commodity in times of stress and hardship; perhaps this will either give me an income of sorts or at least keep my family from having to buy it.
I want to have a large producing garden and orchard. And chickens and a dairy animal. Maybe some bees. Again, there are a few reasons for this, one being, way to cut down on the grocery bill; another is that I like to know what we are eating and where it came from (recent food scares, anyone?); and the last is like the soap – I like to know how to do it so that if the time came, I would be able to feed my family without the grocery store.

And that last sentence points out part of the problem: “if the time came.” I use that phrase a lot when I speak to other people. I say “If.” In my head, it is not “IF” but “WHEN.” See, and that brings us back to the beginning. The “I am a world-is-ending nutcase. A conspiracy-theory-believing wacko.” I firmly believe that there will be a WHEN, not an IF. And I believe that it will happen in my lifetime. I have read the scriptures. I can see the writing on the wall. (And frankly, as bad as this world is, I honestly HOPE it will come SOON!) I have read history – I have studied the Roman Empire, I have done a semester-long class on the beginning of the Gilded Age, and seen the similarities between that time and today. And we all remember how the Gilded Age ended in 1929.

And yet, I cannot say these things to people. They do not like to think about these things. I do not blame them, really. It is hard to face things you fear. And yet, if you are prepared, you will not fear. but it seems that the more I prepare, the more I learn how prepared I am NOT. Sure, I have food. But no alternative supply of energy, which means, if this happened tomorrow, no water. And then what good will be my (dry) food storage? So, I am still fearful. sigh.
And my family thinks I am a nutcase. And I do not mention these things to friends or neighbors (unless they are part of a few that understand and are also working on this).
And the scariest to me, is not the Second Coming of the Lord. That seems like a time of rejoicing and praise. No, it is the prelude. The government taking over our lives, telling us what we can buy, grow, make, sell. Telling us what we can (and canNOT) do with our land or taking hard-earned property. Taking our children because we homeschool or feed them raw milk. That is what scares me. because what can we do about it?
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11:06 AM, Saturday, December 20, 2008 .. Posted by Jonash2004
Boy, can I ever relate! I don't even want to blog in-depth about what we have because too many people IRL read my blog. Not that I don't want to be generous . . . but I can't feed everyone.

It's a WHEN not and IF in my mind as well. And it is so easy to come across the wrong way. :(

Anyway, I just wanted to say hello. Hope you are enjoying the weekend with your family!

~Ashley~

I'm one too!

01:16 PM, Saturday, December 20, 2008 .. Posted by Jan
Loved your post and I can really relate to what your saying.

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03:06 PM, Saturday, December 20, 2008 .. Posted by LivingSimple
I can and do totally relate to what your saying--I do not tell to many people what we do or have nor do I blog about it--but you're right--the time IS coming and its soon!

~Kris

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