Training our Daughters

Posted on Monday, May 14, 2007 at 06:50

This topic is very near to my heart, as I have 2 daughters.  We covered this in church yesterday and my daughters and I found it very helpful.

Training Our Daughters

The picture here that God has made is that our daughters are perfect gifts that God has given.  They are to be at home in undistracted devotion to the Lord.  They are not to be out finding a husband.  Our daughters are to be under their father’s authority until a husband comes to the father for their hand.  It is our son’s job to find a wife.  This is the ideal way of doing it, God’s way.  It puts all of the protections in place for our daughter’s and son’s.   

Girls

Prov. 19:14 House and wealth are an inheritance from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the Lord.

1 Cor. 7:38 He who gives his own virgin daughter in marriage does well, and he who does not give her in marriage will do better.

1 Cor. 7: 32-35 But I want you to be free from concern.  One who is unmarried is concerned about the things of the Lord, how he may please the Lord; but one who is married is concerned about the things of the world, how he may please his wife, and his interests are divided.  The woman who is unmarried, and the virgin, is concerned about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and spirit; but one who is married is concerned about the things of the world, how she may please her husband.  This I say for your own benefit; not to put a restraint on you, but to promote what is appropriate and to secure undistracted devotion to the Lord.

Boys

Prov. 18:22 He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.

Gen. 2:22 The Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man.

The picture here that God has made is that our daughters are perfect gifts that God has given.  They are to be at home in undistracted devotion to the Lord.  They are not to be out finding a husband.  Our daughters are to be under their father’s authority until a husband comes to the father for their hand.  It is our son’s job to find a wife. 

What kind of wife do we want our daughter’s to be?

Strange Woman (adulterous)

Prov. 2:16-17 To deliver you from the strange woman, from the adulteress who flatters with her words; that leaves the companion of her youth and forgets the covenant of her God; (marriage covenant)

Prov. 7:5 That they may keep you from an adulteress, from the foreigner who flatters with her words.

Prov. 9:13 The woman of folly is boisterous, she is naïve and knows nothing.

Prov. 9:15-18 Calling to those who pass by, who are making their paths straight: “Whoever is naïve, let him turn in here,” and to him who lacks understanding she says, “Stolen water is sweet; and bread eaten in secret is pleasant.”  But he does not know that the dead are there, that her guests are in the depths of Sheol.

Romans 16:18 For such men are slaves, not of our Lord Christ but of their own appetites; and by their smooth and flattering speech they deceive the hearts of the unsuspecting.

Jude 16 These are grumblers, finding fault, following after their own lusts; they speak arrogantly, flattering people for the sake of gaining and advantage.

Prov. 5:6 She does not ponder the path of life; her ways are unstable, she does not know it. (she does not think about the consequences of her actions)

Prov. 6:26 For on account of a harlot one is reduced to a loaf of bread, and an adulteress hunts for the precious life.  (Gen. 39:7-12)

Prov. 7:10 And behold, a woman comes to meet him, dressed as a harlot and cunning of heart.

There are so many more on this topic but the main point I am trying to make is that a strange woman is boisterous, loud, naïve, cunning of heart, flatterer, dressed as a harlot, and out hunting for God’s precious life.  She is not under the authority of her father.

Virtuous Woman

Numbers 30:3-4 Also, if a woman makes a vow to the Lord, and binds herself by an obligation in her father’s house in her youth, and her father hears her vow and her obligation by which she has bound herself, and her father says nothing to her, than all her vows shall stand and every obligation by which she has bound herself shall stand.

Numbers 30:13 Every vow and every binding oath to humble herself, her husband may confirm it or her husband may annul it.

Numbers 30:16 These are statutes which the Lord commanded Moses, as between a man and his wife, and as between a father and his daughter, while she is in her youth in her father’s house.

Prov. 2:6 For the Lord gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding.

Prov. 31:25-31 Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she smiles at the future.  She opens her mouth in wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue, she looks well to the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness.  Her children rise up and bless her; Her husband also, and he praises her, saying: “Many daughters have done nobly, but you excel them all.”  Charm is deceitful and beauty vain, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.  Give her the product of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates.

1 Tim. 2:9-11 Likewise, I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly, not with braided hair and gold or costly garments, but rather by means of good works, as is proper for women making a claim to godliness.  A woman must quietly receive instruction with entire submissiveness.

Ephesians 6:1-3 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.  Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise), so that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth.

1 Peter 3:4 but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.

Matthew 12:34 You brood of vipers, how can you, being evil, speak what is good?  For the mouth speaks out of that which fills the heart.

Again, I could go on and on, but the point is who can find an excellent wife?  She is so far and few between.  I want to train my daughter’s to be virtuous.  It all comes down to a matter of the heart.  It’s not about clothing or makeup it is about their heart.  If their heart is to serve and follow the Lord then all the other issues will just fall in line.  They will want to stay up under the authority of their father until they are married.  They will want to be in total devotion to the Lord and not be out hunting. 

I hope this was as helpful to you as it has been for me.

Blessings,

Trixi

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