Homestead Longings

Screaming for Him

I had the weirdest dream I think I have ever had.

I could hear my children behind me, but I told them to just stay where they were safe. Why was I here? I knew this place, but it was different. I was standing in the empty yard where my grandparents house used to be. There were small boats in the canal at the back of the yard and the trees that framed the sides of the yard were all still exactly where I remembered them, but the house was not there.

It was dark and gray and the clouds continued to roll in ever more fierce. I just couldn't figure it out. Why was I here? Part of me knew I was dreaming and kept searching for some reasoning behind it all that just kept evading me.

The storm began to wash over me and the thought to move occured at the same time I realized that I could not  move. Beneath my long skirt, my feet were cemented to the ground. I began a silent prayer in my head for protection. Lord, I need you. But what if he can not hear me? What if I am not loud enough? What if I have been QUIET for too long? And why have I been so quiet?

Deciding suddenly that I would rather offend everyone than risk Him not hearing me, I began screaming as loud as I could at the storm, "JESUS, I NEED YOU!" over and over.

The storm slowly subsided as I was pulled away from the dream, still wondering, why here? Why in that place that I had almost forgotten?