Homestead Longings

Ping Pong

Ugh...I am sitting here slowly munching on a bowl of cereal. I do not normally like cereal in the morning. It leaves me unsatisfied and I get hungry way too soon in the afternoon. But today my stomach is upset. Could have been any number of things from nerves to the vitamins I took this morning. Not sure.

Yet, I have to agree with a friend of mine that Mondays are about the best days of the week. Then again, I guess that Monday wouldn't be the day it is if it weren't for the weekend that precedes it. I got up this morning rather slowly, but when I was finally moving I was very motivated to just get to work. The house and yard were quite a disaster. That is the good and yet bad thing about weekends. My husband is home and when he is around all I want to do is be with him, so I end up not doing much of anything around the house while he is home. Then come Monday it is actually a good thing that he heads off to work so that I actually get something done.

I know that I have said before that I feel like I am just waiting for something to happen, and I still am. I realized the other day that I was feeling more anxiety than usual and had to examine it a little further. There is just so much going on and there are a few details of my health that have been in question lately. Including a long standing problem I have had with my neck for ..oh, 8years now that has been causing me new grief. It all makes me think that something good must be on the way. Why? Because I feel like one of those little ducks in a shooting gallery. Or maybe that cartoon bear I once saw on tv that was bouncing around trying to dodge the bullets that were making ping pong machine sounds as they hit nearby trees. Either way, the distractions are coming hard and heavy at times. I am just trying to remember that they are just that. Distractions from whatever God might like to do in my life.

I know that there is a wonderful thing happening with a bible study I just joined. Believing God. How appropriate. Ya know, it is not easy to stand before God and peers and confess that you have deep seated trust issues with the Lord Almighty. But I am doing it, and He has been faithful to remind me of the many times that He has been there for me. You see, I learned somewhere as a little child that you can pray, but you shouldn't actually expect to get what you are praying for. God doesn't really heal people anymore, or get involved in a really personal way. It is his will after all, and it is a hit or miss thing for our desires and prayers to align with his will. Well, now I am working toward really believing him. Believing that He IS a personal, willing, and loving God. I just have to believe him.

Well, back to work. Have a wonderful day all.