Homestead Longings

My Olympic Best

I don't really like or even understand sports. I have just never been good at them. I like watching them even less. When my husband turned on the Olympics, at first my mind started thinking up other things I could be doing, but in the end I stayed. It is something I actively push myself to do. Sit with my husband and watch something I don't really enjoy because doing so makes him feel loved. Husband and wife, side by side in front of the tv.

Before long, I was actually interested. Not so much about what they were actually doing or who won, but the people. The stories behind their faces. The girls taken away in other countries at the age of 3 to train for gymnastics. The look of utter anguish on the face of the american gymnast who fell off the beem. The looks on the faces of those who won, and in some cases, won big.

One night after the kids were tucked into bed I crawled under the covers of our bed next to my husband and we just lay quietly together watching. That is when God gave my thoughts a suddle nudge. I watched the faces of those "other" seemingly nameless athletes. They were there, giving their all, though no one seemed to really notice them because all the spotlight was on certain individuals. The majority of them had to know that they were going to lose, but they were still there. That is when the whisper came. Have they really lost, or are they winners because they even qualified?

Very good point, Lord. Imagine just being able to qualify to be in the Olympics. Wow. Whether someone else is even better than you or not, to even make it that far means that you are among the best of the best IN THE WORLD!

There are so many things that I enjoy or would like to do but have avoided for no better reason than that I know others are so much better than me at it. In my mind, that means that I am not good enough. But why? Can't I be good without being the best? Though MY best may not measure the same as someone else's, is it still worth doing? Oh course it is.

There was a very real and timely message in God's question for me. He was touching directly on a spot in my heart that had been hardening. I enjoy writing. I have felt blessed to be able to come on here and share with everyone, but I believe that the enemy tried to silence me with doubt. There are so many that are so much better writers than I. I had started to question whether this could really be what God wants me to do. He pointed out to me with that one whisper that I was letting doubt and perfectionism harden my heart. I don't have to be the best, just give my best. In all things that I do for him. Writing, homeschooling, mothering.....

I am blessed that God has even called me (qualified me) to be in the games with him.