What ever happened to a man treating a woman with respect?  Has it been lost to belittling and degrading?

We live in an Air Force community, in which until yesterday, I believed we all were one community, there to be there for one another when spouses were deployed, being neighborly and simply taking care of what God has provided for each of us.  Now, I'm not too sure.  It's amazing how one person in a community can spoil the commraderie that was begun years before them.

We walked our dog last night, on which he normally decides to take care of business on one of our neighbor's lawn.  Being neighborly (and I've witnessed those who aren't neighborly), the girls and I picked up the poop into a bag and looked for the closest garbage can to throw it in.  Out runs the man of the home's garbage can, yelling at us in harsh tones, "What did you just put in my trash can?"  I told him I put "trash in there?"  "Well, that is totally unprofessional, come and take it out?"  Mortified, I walked back to his can, turned it to the side and removed the bag of dog feces.  All the while, he continued to berate me in front of the girls, about how unprofessional I was.   All I could say was, "I'm sorry sir, I didn't know I was doing something wrong?"  The mood home for the remainder of the walk was somber for all of us.

Did I do something wrong?  If someone was walking by with their dog and they needed to dispose of feces, I wouldn't mind if they used my trash can.  Since we don't own any of these homes, I view the trash cans as community property, but more so, I view our community as a whole and we are to make sure to do the responsible thing of picking up after our animals.  Moreover, I felt totally mortified and degraded that he asked me to remove the feces from the garbage pail, while in front of my children.  Unfortunately, my husband is TDY at the moment, otherwise he would have come to my rescue - maybe the incident would have turned out completely differently if he had been there?

Now, I ask myself, what would Jesus do in this situation.  My dear little woman  suggested we bring them a pie and once again apologize for insulting them by throwing trash in their garbage can.  I thought to myself, yeah a "poop pie" thrown right on his doorstep! No, I'm sure that is not what Jesus would have me do, so I prayed instead.  What would you do?

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Posted by gokings13

I wonder what has happened in his life that this would be his response?
I know that men who have been in combat come back "changed". They are very 'suspicious' of every thing (IED's) and everyone, because you never know who's wearing a bomb.

I personally, would just carry come extra bags, bag up the potty, and put it in my own trash can. Saves any further confrontations. I would not bake a pie and take it to him. He sounds like he is dealing with some demons himself.

Laura

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Posted by BlueApple

I guess he views the trash can as his property. I can understand if he came out and asked you what you threw in there (just so he knew), but to be so angry is sad. The best thing you can do is pray for him. And you handled it wonderfully in front of your children..you politely apologized and treated him with the respect he should have also been treating you!

Lovely family!
Julia

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Posted by Anonymous

Well, I will honestly say, if I saw someone walking their dog and bagging their poop, I would fall over in shock. LOL No one does that here. We had an elderly neighbor who lets his dog poop in our dog all the time. I didn't say much because he was elderly and couldn't make it out to clean up.

But I would say, if someone put a piece of trash in my trash can I would be a little taken a back, but certaianly not upset to the extend of this man. I would be upset if the poop wasn't contained correctly, because that would mean a messy trash can to clean up.

I can understand your frustration though. Recently I politely asked my neighbor guy (in his 20's) to please not block my driveway and to tell his friends the same. He called me the "B" word, flipped me off and kept cussing about it in front of his 3 little ones, his boss, his mother and his girlfriend!!! I said, I asked politely, why are you acting like this, and he went on and on. So I stood outside my door and asked him how I should ask him next time, to not, "offend" or piss him off. Anyway, my hubby went over there after work telling him he needed to come apologize to me and he would not stand for this to every happen again. He did apologize to me, and shake my hand in front of hubby, and nothing has happened since.

What really gets me is that the others, all adults, never said a word to him to stop, calm down, please don't make a scene, nothing!!! So obviously, it is accepted in their home! Amazing!

God's Blessings,
Amy Jo

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Posted by gabbie427

I didn't mean to be anonymous. LOL Sorry about that!!!

God's Blessings,
Amy Jo

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