prairiemom

Does Busyness Equate Godliness?

     Recently a friend and I were discussing an attitude that is prevalent in many churches. Women, in particular, are led to believe that to be godly is to be constantly busy with church work.

     The result of that attitude is that both men and women, who seek to serve God wholeheartedly, are as hurried and stressed as people of the world.

     How does one get off the busyness bandwagon and live a life pleasing to God?

     I have a few thoughts on the subject and I welcome yours as well.

     Regular time in God's Word gives us answers to the predicament. Romans 12:2 states: "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - his good, pleasing and perfect will."

     A chronic state of busyness and stress is a worldly pattern that has often been adopted by the church.

     People who were accustomed to being "always on the run" before they came to know the Lord often don't know how to slow down and will apply a fast-paced attitude to their Christian walk.  Sometimes those who have been raised in Christian homes know nothing but a fast-paced life.

     There is talk about a purpose driven church.  In Scripture, I see evidence where God leads His people, but nowhere do I find believers who are "driven" by Him.   Galatians 5:25 "Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit."

     Sometimes Christians don't fully comprehend that our significance comes from our relationship with our Lord and they continue to search for significance through church activities. Proverbs 29:25 "Fear of man is a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe."

     When women seek to be significant to others, they often neglect their families and their homes, becoming the "foolish woman who tears down her own house. " Proverbs 14:1. 

     Then the husband and children, whom God has placed in our care, become neglected and our homes become chaotic, differing little from those of the world.

     I am so grateful that God will provide wisdom for us anytime. "If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him."  James 1:5

     There are many of us at Homestead Blogger who are in the Titus 2 stage of life.   Lord, may we have many opportunities to encourage younger women who are trapped in the world's system of busyness to: love their husbands and children, to be busy at home, to be kind and to be subject to their husbands so that no one will malign the word of God." 

     How does one avoid the busyness trap?

     First, when opportunites to serve are presented, it is vital to take the time to pray about them, especially those that are long term. Obviously some situations are an emergency and need to be dealt with at the time.

     I am grateful for a husband who will tell me when an opportunity to serve would be better left for someone else or when I am fatigued and my family is suffering for it.  He has much more wisdom in this area than I do and submitting to leadership makes for a harmonious home.

     A couple very obvious "red flags" I have learned to recognize are: being too busy for daily time in the Word and prayer and chronically hurried family life.  If I'm skipping time in the Word and prayer, I will have very little to offer anyone because my "tank" is being depleted and not refilled.  If I am constantly hurrying at home, so I can go out and minister to someone, I am not ministering to my family and they are my most important ministry.

     God's Word instructs us to: feed the hungry, give a drink to the thirsty, invite in strangers, clothe the naked and look after the sick, and most of all to carry out the Great Commission, but not while chronically neglecting our families.

     What about you? How do you determine when your life is out of balance and how do you make corrections?

Loving God and loving each other.............

{ 11:10 , Tuesday, April 10, 2007 } { Posted by patintenn }

God says my first and foremost job is to take care of my home and family.

SO after loving God and loving my family, I then pray for guidence in what I should or need to be doing. I am incharge of the children's department at our church. We are a small church family but a lot of children for our size. I look to my pastor and my husband for the guide lines to follow as far as "group activities". I know that they seek God before they give me an answer on something. But don't get me wrong, I too seek God for myself, I just like to know that these two are watching out for me.

I too, agree that many women are "keeping busy" for the wrong reasons. I really feel sorry for those who think if they have to work and stay busy in order to be "right" with God.

Thank you for bringing this up today. It is something we all should think about and check ourselves up on.

Come by my place sometime for a visit.
Pat

Such Wise Words

{ 04:50 , Tuesday, April 10, 2007 } { Posted by Patti }

Denise,
What a great post!!

As one who has formerly been one of the very busy church workers, I am more sensitive to this situation than the average person probably is. All around me I see moms who are burned out because of their church involvement. They have taken on ministries to the neglect of their families. I did that too...for years...and my reasons were difficulty in saying no and a desire for the applause of man. I think those are the most common reasons that women over commit.

Now, I first ask my husband's opinion of the activity, and I submit to what he says. I also give myself the freedom to say no....remembering that just because someone wants me to do something it doesn't mean it's God's will that I do it. If my family is neglected, which almost always happens when I am out of the home too much, then it is not an activity for me.

But it is not just church over-involvement that we struggle with. It is just busyness in general...running here and there, socializing, meetings, school activities, sports. Our society tends to associate busyness with success. We just need to say "NO" to too much activity, whether it be in the church or in the community. When we are always on the go, do we have the time to properly minister to our families? (I don't_) And when we are always gone, do we have an opportunity to know and minister to our neighbors ? (Formerly, the only time my neighbors would see me was when I would get in my car and drive off somewhere.) We need to slow it down in order to build relationships in our lives.

Thanks for sharing such a powerful truth.

Love,
Patti

Untitled Comment

{ 06:57 , Wednesday, April 11, 2007 } { Posted by chimicole }

Wow...What a truth!
I was one of those "busy" women until God slowed my life to an almost complete halt by my Mom's illness.
I was a full time college student (with one semester to go till graduation) and a full time nurse on a dementia unit. My family was sadly pushed to the back.
When Mom became ill with cancer, I was traveling back and forth (3.5 hour drive one way) to her house taking her to radiation and doctor appointments. I would leave from school, go straight to her house, stay a couple of days and come home in time to catch a couple of hours sleep, and go to work and do 12 hour shifts.
The Lord saw how my family was suffering, and He saw what was happening to me, and He put a halt to it.
Mom developed diabetes (her blood sugar was so high when it was discovered, that her brain was damaged), I failed school by 2 points (can be accepted back to the program in 3 years, but I'm not going to), and I lost my job. All between November and January.
Now, I stay home and take care of Mom (who lives here now, another thank You God!) and take care of my family.
The results have been a closer relationship with God, with my children and my home is taken better care of than ever before.
We have also decided to homeschool our childen, since we are more apt to listen to them and the horror stories of what they have been going through in public school.
The good Lord will let a woman know when she is overextending and her family is suffering....
Thank you for a timely post!
Hugs~
Julie :)

Untitled Comment

{ 06:14 , Thursday, April 12, 2007 } { Posted by jennikl9 }

This has been a subject heavy on my heart for probably the last 6 months. I used to have weeks where every day I could be doing something. I would always say to myself why do we do this. Then I started to really listen to Cindy Rushton and God had been talking, well SCREAMING at me, to slow down. I have always been a person who really enjoyed doing things with people. Which I don't think is wrong but your family can not suffer for it. Now I have to evaluate my schedule everyday. I am a person who is starting to become stronger in her faith. That is another subject so it is a new thought to me to bring my schedule before the Lord, but isn't it funny how he takes care of things. Like this week for example. Usually we have something on Monday, Tuesday is our day home, Wednesday is church and then Thursday we had something to do at a friends house. That sounds like a busy week to me. Well MOnday and Tuesday were normal but Wednesday we got dumped with SNOW. Yes Snow in April and the snow is still coming down so I am not going tonight either. So God cleared my schedule for me.

I want to leave with one thought that I read a couple weeks ago on how to stop being busy. This lady whenever she was asked to do something she would say "Can I get back to you." Doesn't that sound so simple. I always want to be the one that saves the day and if you really think about it you are not the only person who can do that "thing" Then it is not something you have to do. You are the only one who can be your children's mom. So you can not say no to that.

sorry for the rambling but this is a heavy subject on my heart and I am trying to change how I run my life.

thanks

{ 07:36 , Thursday, April 12, 2007 } { Posted by mccrjill }

thanks for the reminder to keep steadfast at home. I agree with all you said - don't be driven, but keep Jesus in the center - on the throne - He is all and will guide us what we should be doing. Romans 12:1-2 has always helped me too. Jill

Untitled Comment

{ 09:16 , Thursday, April 12, 2007 } { Posted by Roberta }

My husband comes from a large family, 6 brothers and one sister. When he was growing up, both of his parents were overly involved in church activities, Being that they were also dairy farmers, there wasn't alot of time left over to just be together as a family. There parents had a saying, " that we can be a family at church." Now that they are grown, they all resent the over amount of time their parents spent at church. I know my sil's have discussed it, and all of our husbands strongly encourage us to put a limit on church activites. I find that around holiday time, Easter and Christmas is when my husband feels the pinch of my church involvement with Easter cantata's, Christmas programs ect. I am very involved in the music and usually direct the childrens program and have always made all the costumes.
Now that my husbands parents are alone with no children at home, they are not as involved in thier church but their relationship to each other is very strained. I think that with the farm and with the church involvement, they never really spent time alone cultivating their relationship together. It is sad to watch but it also a huge reminder for the rest of us in the family. I think even though we are involved in church and we say we are doing it for the Lord that when we neglect our family that that is where Satan attacks and little be little widdles it down. (at least that is our experience).
Roberta