Homesteading: A Woman's Journey

Hamster Wheels

10:59, Tuesday, August 8, 2006 .. Posted in Personal Thoughts .. 2 comments .. Link

Have you even watched a hamster or similar animal on one of those wheels? They run so fast, trying to get somewhere. They run and run and run. Then, they may stop and rest or get off the wheel, only to later return to the running again. No matter how many times they get on that wheel, or how many hours they run on the wheel each day, they never travel any further. They are still on that same wheel. What makes them keep getting onto that wheel? What drives them to keep trying something that gets them no where?

Sometimes, I think I am just like that hamster. I get an idea in my head and it takes me awhile to see that maybe I need to re-think things abit. This has happened recently. I allowed too many things to take a priority status in my life and now my health has been suffering. My Fibromyalgia pain has worsened, which in turn causes a lack of the ability to sleep, and I have been getting headaches that last up to 4 days without any relief. Just because of the stress I had been allowing into my life.

A couple of weeks ago, my pastor asked how I was doing. I said that everything was alright. At that moment, I really believed it to be so. Now, I know that I was putting myself under more stress than necessary. I have allowed what others' think to rule my decisions in several areas of my life, instead of putting my own needs and common sense first. I am so grateful that I have my beloved husband to help me see things straight! After a long talk today, we decided together that I am going to ease up on myself. This involves removing the things from my life that are just not working. Those "hamster on the wheel" things that I have stubbornly kept working at, but were getting nowhere. Some of the things involved activities that I genuinely love to do, but because of the situation, I was beginning to no longer enjoy or find relaxation in them. The goal being that by easing up on these things, my pain level will lessen and I will be able to get the rest I need. Maybe I will have the bonus blessing of being able to enjoy those activities again since they will be purely for my own enjoyment and relaxation.

In a way, I feel like I am being selfish. My beloved though has taught me that it is okay for me to have hobbies that are just for my own enjoyment. He knows that I love being creative and making things. Besides which, he also enjoys the results of my efforts. Most every hobby that I have is something that can be turned into something my family can enjoy or benefit from.

Tonight, I feel a huge relief. It is as though a large weight has been removed from my shoulders. What a blessing!

Something that I am going to be doing the end of this week just for the fun of it is to attend a Creating Keepsakes Scrapbooking Convention in Tulsa. I am going on Friday to the vendor fair. It is basically a trade show where scrapbooking supply manufacturers and vendors set up booths. They are open to the public. This is my first time going to one of the scrapbook shows. I am really looking forward to it. I will end up having to take my baby in a sling since they only allow the umbrella strollers, which we do not have. It will be a fun show though. I am going to be there early so that I can avoid driving in the heat as much as possible. While up there, I hope to see some friends of ours who have not yet seen Abigail except through pictures. I am really excited about this!

Tonight, my beloved came home for awhile. He is delivering a load tomorrow early morning to a location about 3 hours from home. What a treat to have him here at dinner time and to see him have a chance to play with Abigail and also put her to bed. He got her all ready for bed, then we read her a little story and Joe said a prayer for her. That is our routine. Each morning, we have a prayer with Abigail. At night, after changing her and getting her ready for bed, we read a story and have another prayer. We started this about a week ago and really enjoy it.

Over the weekend while Joe was home, he tape recorded himself reading Abigail's little books. I play these for her when her Daddy is away at work. He is also recording tapes during his downtime on the road. He took Abigail's children's Bible stories book with him and is taping recording stories from the book for her. When he is home, he sits with Abigail on his lap and reads to her everyday. I read to her on the days when he is working. We hope that by reading to her from such an early age, it will help to encourage her in reading later on when she is older. I have also heard much about the importance of reading to a young baby & how it improves their vocabulary when they start talking.

If any of you who read this happen to attend the scrapbook convention in Tulsa this Friday, and you see a gal with a baby in a sling made from teddy bear fabric, you may have located me!

God Bless,
Paula

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12:39, Thursday, August 10, 2006 .. Posted by meme21713
yes at times i c myself just in your shoes...Not willing to give anything up so I can have time for ME. It is not selfish it is mental survival....Enjoy your weekend at the show......Debbie

I Can Relate

11:43, Friday, August 11, 2006 .. Posted by Patti
Paula,
My experience has been the same. In fact, the reason that I started blogging was to share the message with women that our constant busyness has caused us stress and physical problems. That was my experience. I had great health until I left my home-centered life to pursue a life of constant activity. Suddenly, I had a multitude of health problems, autoimmune issues being one of them. It was not until I slowed my life down that my health has gotten better. Not perfect, but better than it's been in years. And even now, when I have too many busy days in a row, I will get migraines.
You call it the hamster wheel. I call it the merry-go-round, which isn't very merry!!
Have a blessed day.
Patti

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