Well, as the time quickly approaches to start our home schooling year, I am facing some pretty deep emotion over it.  As in not wanting to do it!  Go ahead and ream me out...

I have come to the hard realization that, quite often, I really just don't enjoy it.  Now don't get me wrong, I love spending time with my kids.  But teaching them is quite another matter.  I like the idea of what home school could be, but the reality is often a far cry from that.  Sometimes I ask myself, "Why are you doing it, then?"  And sometimes I think the answer is that I do it because I feel I have to.  I fully admit that if we had the finances, the boys would be in a private Christian school.  But we don't, so the only option left is to home school.  At least that's how it seems.  I like our elementary school.  Two of the three boys went there for about 2 years.  The youngest is ready for Kindergarten this year and he would love to go there and make some friends.  There are no kids in our church his age and home school activity/support groups are very few and far between out here where we live.  In the years we have tried home schooling in the past, I felt very isolated.  In the years we used the local ps, I felt much more connected.  It's a small town so you get to know others through school and sports and town events.  Maybe the real root of all this is me feeling SO pre-occupied with all the work that needs doing on the house so we can get it up for sale....I don't know!