Welcome to Dana's blog!

MIL update

I'm posting here since the internet is slow and sporadic here at best.

I made it. Made a poor choice and stopped for gas/bathroom at a greyhound bus stop. I was very scared and if I didnt' fear arriving to the shower already wet, I'd have driven to the next stop. The shower was nice.

Things are OK here. MIL can get to the bathroom so that is wonderful. We went to St. L today for chemo. I"m so glad that trip is over. I was the driver and MIL nad FIL fought about how to get there. CHemo was cancelled. I don't know that MIL realizes how bad she is. Dr. mentioned hospice twice. Not to get it now, but that they need to be thinking about it. She's already on full time O2 and barely gets around. The clots in her leg are causing major issues. They can't up the blood thinners anymore lest she start bleeding at the lungs. THey simply can not arrest the cancer. She said that she won't need hospice until after she tries holistic therapies. SHE DOESN"T HAVE TIME! I don't mean to not try them, but I don't know that she gets how bad she is!!!!!! And then she was saying that she can't have her blood thinners if she has lovenox, etc, etc. She was very well behaved and I went to bed and she cut loose on FIL. Poor guy.

For the bad part (yes, it's worse!). SHe's having nightmares. Last night she dreamt that the devil was telling her that he'd take her now and she said that she's in so much pain that she wanted to say yes. I don't know how much of this is fear driven or is this is really teh case. she was crying in the doc's office saying she hates to sleep cuz of them. I told her before we left (she said that she was going to ask the priest) what to do. I told her that she needed to tell Satan to LEAVE HER ALONE. And that I've done it. She won't take it to heart.:( Please pray for her. I won't give up this battle if that's what it is.........

Back to the chemo cancelling: The doc said that she's just not strong enuf and they set it up for 2 weeks IF she can. I give her a 25% shot of beign able to do it. FIL asked if waiting was bad and the doc said that at this point she's at too much of a risk of infection. Did I mention that she's not eating or drinking hardly anything? They gave her an Rx for a diuretic adn warned her that it causes dehydration (to help the phlebitis on her leg--it's HUGE). I was thinking NO NO NO NO! She already goes for IV fluids!

ANd she's supposed to have her last 3 radiation treatments this week. I hope she goes.

SOrry, I'm sure that this is jumbled cuz I"m a bit tired myself.....