Well after another unintended break from blogging, here I am!
Recovering has taken much longer then I would have thought. But the good news is the times I do feel good are better then prior to surgery. I must have been sick for a while.

Many of our church and homeschool families have blessed us with wonderful dinners for the family. I do wish I could have eaten some, but broth and jell-o had been my cuisine. I am back to eating some foods and with the added enzymes; I can eat quite a bit now.

I have been busy with getting back to organizing for winter. Now all the children have boots, coats and plenty of gloves! What a sight to take 10 kiddos to purchase snowboots!

We are attempting to work on completing the house projects so we can put the house on the market. My DH could not wait any longer to move to farm, so he bought a cow!

The children and DH are having a blast with her. She will have her first calf in March. We are excited to have fresh milk again and all of those fun foods one can make with cream.

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 Oct 7 in the wee hours, I was drinking my coveted quiet cup of Java, when I began to experience an extreme pressure in my diaphragm. I have had it a few times over the years and have passed out from it. I have had a few EKG’s, but they failed to show anything other then high blood pressure and tachycardia (fast heart beat). It has always been chalked up to stress..like being type A doesn’t work at my age. Then after a head on I had approx 5 years ago I accepted this theory.

Anyway, that morning the pressure was overwhelming and like nothing I have ever experienced. I attempted to reach my beloved as he was sleeping, and I passed out. I came to and crawled to the bedroom. DH was slow to respond and when he did I was drenched and he thought when I told him to call 911 he thought  a Tums would help…eekk. I check my heart rate and it was slow and faint, so I requested he call 911 again. DH did ask if my heart was still beating..news flash, if there is no heart beat, it would be difficult for one to check their own heartbeat. (it gives something to laugh about in old age!). Paramedics arrived quickly and my heart rate was in the 30’s and my O2 stats in the 70’s..yes this is abnormal. So I still had my wits about me, my background is medical, there I am assessing what the paramedics are doing!

I was rushed to the nearest ER, and I am happy to say our POA for care of my children went smoothly and DH was there at the hospital when I arrived. After many tests, it was determined to be my gall bladder. I would have never thought…I eat lean and one of the risk factors is being overweight, but not in this case. My surgery was postponed for 2 days. I was placed in the coronary unit as my heart went through full assessment. My pancreas became infected as well as my liver.  

The hospital is completing major renovation. Outside my window was the steady pounding of heavy machinery, jack- hammers and my bed malfunctioned. With each moment my bed re-inflated it self and initially the noise it made, I thought I was sitting on the life flight heli-pad. With my heart cleared for surgery and pancreas stable, it was a relief to leave that room. I was disappointed in the poor nursing care.

I went to surgery in hopes of having the pain of pressure relieved. I began to wake up from surgery, to hear voices, with an urgent tone, “She’s Crashing!” . All I could think was “Oh Lord please be with me”…With another medication and continued O2, I left the OR with 5 small incisions. They were unable to work on clearing the pancreas; I would wait for the next day. I will continue to have nothing by mouth for at least another day. I had another procedure the next day to “empty” the pancreas of stones and infection. Once again, I did not tolerate that well. I became very swollen and had a not so lovely hue of yellow. I ended up with pneumonia from inactivity.

 After being on O2 for 4 of my 5 days and one lovely meal of broth and jell-o, I begged the doctor to discharge me. I stressed to him, my health was declining from the lack of nursing care. He allowed me to go home with the stipulation of a strict diet and bed rest. I am to follow up with labs every few days. My cardiology report came back great, except for a vessel that had become enlarged from my work out days stays open and this is the faint feeling I had experiencing. It is no worry..just get back to exercise.

My labs are slowly showing improvement. I am feeling better. I am blessed that my family and friends stepped in to help with our now 9 children. We have 6 adopted and 3 foster 10years to 3 months. It really relived my husband to fully care for the children and I.

I am beginning to see may be why the Lord has not moved us to the country yet. I need to get into better shape. We have a rough draft if anything were to happen to us, who would take the children. The Lord has also cemented my desire to be a good wife and continue our work as foster parents.

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My favorite time of the year has arrived. The clean crisp morning air while sipping coffee curled up to a good book is more like more spring to some, while the renewed energy is similar to a New Year’s resolution to others.

I have been on an unintended break from life. The life of dreams, fun, goals, and the thrill of waking up to meet the Lord had almost disappeared. I know His mercies are new every morning, but I have dreadful long season of difficulties. “It” had begun to ensnare me. How did this happen? Thankfully, through all of our issues of grief and despair I know the Lord was right with me.

It is time to “be” what God has intended for me and it is not to wallow in muck and mire. So easy to say, but it will take an extra dose, that concerted effort to bring this to fruition. “Fall Back” umm..No! Fall on me knees is more like it.  

It is now time to dream of sewing projects for Christmas. Canning, though this year it will only be fruit is a delight I am looking forward to do. It is cool enough to bake bread again, fill the freezer with meals, and stock the pantry with case lot and grain sales. We have started school after a short break. I will plant some winter type greens, carrots and peas.  

My doctor reminded me to start “deliberate” exercise…so walking will begin. He also said put on more weight; a good diet is back on the menu. A few other projects to be dusted off too. Without a vision the people perish…indeed this is true. 

I will continue my journey, watching for my rocks in my path, staying on the trail the Lord has set for me. We have not made it to our farm, but I am beginning to see this as “not yet” and I am good with that.   

Today I will enjoy the delight of the Lord; He will take care of the rest! Have a blessed day!

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