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Thursday, April 24, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by CaraDD
You don't know me, but as I was reading your blog, I just wanted to give you a little encouragement. I'm sure you haven't failed your mom...there are two types of Alzheimer's, one that usually comes on earlier and takes longer for degeneration and one that usually comes on later and is usually much quicker. It's a horrible disease. Just do what you can for her and if an outsider's opinion matters, don't do the tube. I have seen people linger in pain and a nearly vegetative state for years because of a feeding tube. Especially if your mom knows Jesus, think on that. Hang in there!
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Thursday, April 24, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by Mennobrarian
Please don't feel like you've failed your mother, these things happen on God's clock and not one set by doctors, healthcare workers, or ever your own. Alzheimer's is an insidious disease that can take someone quickly or over a vast stretch of time. You are a good daughter, and your mother is lucky to have such a personally invested caretaker.
Many Blessings,
Monica
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Thursday, April 24, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by farmgal35
I am sorry to hear about your mom. I know what you are going though. In June, it will be two years ago, that we started going though the same thing with my mamaw. She had had some small spells off and on. But then in June she had one big spell and they took her to the hospital. The doctors told us their was nothing more the could do. No need to bring her back to the hospital. She was completely bed ridden. They sent in Hospice. There were days she would not eat or drink. She wouldn`t take her meds. She would call us every name under the sun. She would use awful cuss words at us. This coming from one of the sweetest ladies. Very strong Christian woman. But the part of the her brain that she used to reason with was damage from so many strokes. She was in the early stages of Alzheimer's. Watching her go though what she did was one of the worst thing I have ever done. Now this doesn`t mean your mom is going to do this. I am going to put you and your mom on some churches pray list. If that is ok with you. You are in my prayers. If you need to talk, I am here for you. Just email me. sheryl
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Thursday, April 24, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by seventhheaven
I think you have been wonderful in caring for your mom. This is a terrible disease and it affects others differently at different rates. My grandmother has vascular dimentia caused by strokes. Its been two years since its been diagnosed but i believe 10 years in the making. Since the two years my mom has had to take up more and more of caring for her. Right now she still lives at home and is functional, but we all know that could change because they havent been able to stop the mini strokes. I think you are doing the best you can, some diseases are just hard to fight. I will pray for your family. You have been through alot the last months. God bless you.
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Thursday, April 24, 2008 - You Are Truely a Blessing . . . . .
Posted by CarrieAnn7
. . . . . to your mother and those around you. In a culture that disregards life at each end of the spectrum, you have chosen to give of yourself to make another 's life better. You are a wonderful caregiver to your mother and a steller example to those around you. You cannot look at what others have done or not done; what others have experienced or not experienced. You can only do your best for your mother. God knows what is best for each person as they age and their earthly body detereorates, and He knows that what is best for your mom is YOU!!! Keep up the good loving care.
Galatians 6:9 tells us: "Be not weary in well-doing for in due season we shall reap if we faint not."
Blessings dear blog-land friend; Carrie
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Thursday, April 24, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by southernbelle
Well I don't know what I can say any better than what the others have said. Great advice given. I'm sorry about the bad news and glad about the good news. It's not your fault at all that she's gone down hill it's the fault of the disease. Ask the doctor. If he knows anything at all about the disease he will tell you that. I hope this weekend brings some answers and some time of refreshment since your family will be visiting.
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Thursday, April 24, 2008 - Kitty,
Posted by knitteralaska
You are a good daughter. Has anyone told you that lately? I hope and pray I can be there for my mother and father when the time comes. You are an example of what love really means. - Briana
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Thursday, April 24, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by ByHisForgiveness
Kitty, please feel free to private message me *anytime* you feel the need to talk, dear sister in Christ. I know the path you are walking down.
My mother has been living with us for 7 years now and has been going downhill for the last year but particularly the last 4 months. She is now bed-bound, has a urinary catheter, is down to 75 lbs., and must have the simplest of tasks done for her. She is too weak to even have a bowel movement so I must deimpact her 3x per week. It's a major undertaking for my dh and I to get mom up into a wheelchair to wheel her into the bathroom to give her a sponge bath and wash her hair.
This is a cross that mom, myself and my family have been carrying for awhile so I understand your feelings of "failure"... and all the other feelings too, that come along with being a caregiver.
I am here for you. All you need to do is message me and we can chat.
God bless you with patience and stamina to walk down this path the Lord has called you on~ Andrea
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Friday, April 25, 2008 - Thinking of you Kitty,
Posted by lancelotacres
I just wanted to let you know that you are in my thoughts and prayers during this hard time with your mom. I watched my parents go through a hard time with my grandparents and I know it's not easy on anybody in the family and especially hard on the caregivers.
I would like to suggest that you take the offer of all-day help for your mom. Even if you are there and can sit by her side all day if you want, the help will be nice when you want to go for a walk or sit outside for a few minutes without worrying about your mom during that time.
My parents didn't have that help so us kids tried to pitch-in where we could, but they really would have benefitted from an all-day aide, just so they could get little breaks here and there to avoid burn-out, and get out of the house occasionally.
I'm glad your brother is coming for a visit, I hope you have a wonderful time with him and that your spirits are lifted.
Never EVER think you are failing your mom. She is very blessed to have such a caring and giving daughter during this time in her life.
Hugs,
Lisa
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Friday, April 25, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by BlueApple
Kitty...nothing but love and prayers being sent your way. The heavy crosses we endure are sweetness in the hands of God. You hang in there.
Julia
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Friday, April 25, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by a1health
Kitty,
I think your Mom is just rebelling about the situation. I'm sure she doesn't like being taken from her home to live with her daughter. I wouldn't take it personally. If she needs a feeding tube then so be it, but she is the one refusing to eat. My grandfather ended up doing the same thing. He went very rapidly into decline because he felt he lost all independence. But, he ended up lasting several years once he realized he was going to go to the nursing home if he didn't do what was asked of him.
Blessings to you and yours,
~Farrah
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Saturday, April 26, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by ByHisForgiveness
Thank you for posting on my blog, (((((((Kitty))))))).
Our "luck" was short lived I'm afraid. *sigh* When our weekend caregiver wasn't here by 1:15pm (she was due at 1pm), I called her cell phone and when she answered she said she was at a gambling casino in Michigan and wouldn't be able to work today. *sigh* She started being mom's caregiver just last weekend!! So I told her that we would have to look for someone more dependable and I thanked her for her time.
So now we don't have any outside help either. I'm going to blog about that on my blog since it's a subject heavy on my heart tonight.
How long have you been caring for your mom, Kitty? I've been bathing my mom everyday for over 7 years now but mom's been bed-bound for since the first week in February. It was so wonderful because last weekend (the first weekend for the caregiver) our entire family.... my dh, our son, our youngest daughter and myself all got into the car together and went to the bookstore. As we were pulling down our street, we all started to giggle because it was the first time that all 4 of us were in the car at the same time in nearly 3 months. It felt so wonderful.... but the wonderful feeling was short-lived.
Our cross is a heavy one, dear sister. I will keep you in my prayers... please be assured of that.
God bless you as you care for your mother~ Andrea
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Monday, April 28, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by gabbie427
I am praying for you sweetie. I am so sorry to hear about mom failing like she is but don't take this as a personal failure!!! If you mother were in her right mind and you asked her if you did anything wrong you know she would say of course not, she is doing all she should and her best. Irrational thoughts like this can haunt you dear. And I do understand because as my parents wer failing before they died, I did the same thing. I had a wise friend tell me similar to what I am telling you.
Rely on God in these times and don't let the devil place any blame on you. Don't fall into the head games of failure and the I should have's!!! You are a wonderful daughter to her!
God's Blessings,
Amy Jo
PS My prayers are with you dear.
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