Shared in Our Walk as Women
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Disclaimer - Please know that I am still in the midst of learning and growing, and expect that I will continue as such. If you have anything to add or share, I do hope you'll take the opportunity to do so through the comment section at the end of each entry!
My greatest aim, as a woman, is to walk in a way that pleases the Lord. According to the Word of God, a woman has vital responsibilities. The example we lead will affect those around us, and either point them to the Lord, or repel them. We will live on in the lives we touch. But, it can often be difficult to arrange our workday in such a way as to manage everything that needs attention. Too often, we feel overwhelmed by the demands on ourselves and our time. We wonder where to start! We experience stress that causes us to react in such a way as to hurt our testimony. We feel confused and disappointed and wonder, "Where am I going wrong? What need I change?" My prayer, is that by addressing the issues outlined in my "introduction" to this series, I will be both challenged to deepen my own dedication to my Lord and my family, and help others to do the same. I believe it is of great importance to begin here with arranging our workday. For, if we can just master this one thing, we will find there is room (and energy!) for everything else that rests on our shoulders. So... how do we start? I recently enjoyed an article by Nancy Campbell in the November 2005 issue of Above Rubies. She entitled it, "Dressed for the Job". She wrote, in part: What do you do when you get out of bed in the morning? Do you get dressed, or wander around in your robe or dressing gown? I believe that what you do depends on your understanding of the task you have at hand. If you think your career of mothering and homemaking is insignificant, you may not be motivated to get dressed immediately. However, if you understand that you have the most important career in the nation, you will be sure to get dressed for the job. You will be up and ready to report to your Heavenly Employer. Does your husband ever go to work in his pajamas? What an embarrassment that would be! Does a business woman go to her office in her nightgown? Laughable! But what do you do? How do you go to work? Yes, the most basic thing you must do, is realize the importance of your job and Who you are actually working for! You must make it a point to immediately get dressed, right down to the shoes (somehow, putting your shoes on makes one less likely to do nothing! It tells the body to get busy!). Every person has their own particular habits and energy levels as their day progresses. Some are "morning" people. Others seem to do their best work in the late afternoons. How is it for you? This is where you should start in determining how your day should flow. I have learned that I have more energy in the morning. Shortly after noon, my energy begins to shrink. By night, there's almost nothing! So... by correcting when I scheduled my daily work, I found I was more productive ~ and keeping to a "plan" or "written routine" began to work! It will do no good to sit down with a sheet of paper and write up a dreamy schedule. You have lofty ideas! We all do! Without taking your energy levels and basic habits into account your new schedule will fail -- It will include too many things you'll never get to. Your goals will be impossible to reach, and you'll end up pitching your new written routine and give up. You'll be back to "square one". So, be realistic. First, note the things that you find need doing, daily. These might include: spending time with the Lord; washing dishes after breakfast, after lunch and after supper; keeping up with laundry; homeschooling the children; vacuuming high-traffic areas; tidying certain rooms; wiping down the bathroom(s); making your bed; etc... Write down everything! -- Even things such as putting the children down for naps, taking a bath, spending time on the computer, or sewing. Now, look at your list. Are there any tasks you could assign to "weekly" slots, instead? Maybe you've written down "dusting". That could be switched to a weekly. Are there any jobs you could enlist your children to do? What are their ages and capabilities? Tiny children can follow you around and "help". But, as children age, they can easily be trained to take over certain duties. Assign them chores. They are part of your family, and you are teaching them to not only be productive adults someday, but to serve others. Busy children are happy children! Make sure you teach your children exactly what you expect the job to be done like. What does the job include? How will you be checking it? -- I've found it helpful (and fun!) to create little "flyers" to post for my helpers throughout the house. For example, in the inside cupboard of the bathroom, my children can find a detailed "rundown" of the job of cleaning the bathroom. The children can check off each task for the job as it is done. They will never wonder or worry whether they've "missed something", and it saves me the stress of having to repeatedly assure them that, "Yes, I did tell you that was part of the task." Face it. Children, like us, have a sin nature. If they think they can "get out" of a job, they will. They'll breeze through and hope you don't notice what they missed. And, Mom! Never forget to check up on your child's work! If it's not done properly, call them back. They will soon learn that it does not pay to do a haphazard job, and will complete it right the first time. It will never suit to go back and do it yourself! Truly, it won't! If you can reduce your "daily" load, even a little, this will open new "windows of time" for other tasks/needs in your life. Many women use these new "windows" to do 15 minute "deep cleans" in various, rotating areas of their house. Others use this time to exercise or to read their Bibles. Maybe there is a "running to-do list" you have that you can never "get" to, because you're so busy trying to stay on top of the daily tasks... By scrutinizing your proposed "Daily Schedule" and making feasible changes, you can open up room each day to fit the "want to"s! Another important thing you should do is create a "Home Management Folder". I cannot even begin to describe just how much mine has freed me! I can now locate information quickly and easily. Everything I might need is located right there in my folder. My husband used to get so annoyed with me. He would ask me for some piece of information, and I couldn't provide it. Or, he would ask about a bill, and I would have to tell him I wasn't sure or didn't know/remember. Just today, I was at the hospital for a simple lab draw. My doctor (in another town) suggested I use our local lab to draw my blood for our convenience. He knew it would save a lot of time and travel. When we arrived, the receptionist had questions that I couldn't easily provide. The "old me" would have panicked. But, because of my folder, I was confident that a simple phone call if needed, to the older children at home, would solve everything. I only would need to direct them to a certain section in my folder. I'd tried several times to use a "planner" in the past. It never worked. The bought ones simply did not contain the item areas that I had most trouble with. They seemed to be created, more, for a CEO or high-powered business executive. Others had neat sections, but I never really used them. It was wasted space. I strongly advise all women to create their own folders. This will allow you to conform it to your own unique needs and circumstances. This is what has worked for me: My binder is not fancy, in the least. I know a lot of women who really have "dressed" theirs up. Mine is pretty to me on the outside, but that's where all beauty dies. It just wasn't important to me. I wanted function. The first page of my Home Management folder contains my "daily routine". This is followed by my "weekly tasks" (for example, Monday I take care of changing the sheets on each bed. Tuesday, I focus on deep-cleaning the bathrooms, etc...). Next, I have a year-at-a-glance calendar I created on a "Hallmark" program we have here at the house. These three pages are in separate "sheet protectors" at the front of my folder. Next, I have three notebooks. The first contains five sections (which I created "tabs" for, for easy access) including bills my husband has had me pay (includes amts due, how paid, check #/verification codes, date paid, and amt remaining if any), business addresses/phone numbers (doctors, service providers, emergency numbers, even my husband's work and cell phone number which I do not have memorized!), addresses/numbers for friends and family, birthdays/anniversaries for loved ones and vital information (including all our birth dates, social security numbers, account numbers, debit card numbers, etc...). My next notebook (also tabbed) contains my homeschooling goals for the year, homeschool log, homeschool resources/materials being used this year, books read with the children, and activity ideas. The last notebook is mine. It, too, is tabbed and in it, I have my running to-do list, my wish-list, my reading list (books I've read so far this year and books I want to obtain/read), several different grocery lists and their corresponding meal plans, and sewing measurements. I have a zippered sleeve at the front of my folder, as well. So often I do not have the things I need when I need them! Or, my husband will ask me for something, and suddenly, I cannot find what he wants. So... in this pouch I have placed such necessaries as postage stamps, a sheet of our address labels, envelopes, pens, checkbook, etc... I have a separate "journal" type notebook that I keep my personal devotions in. My home folder is big and clunky and I do not like to tote it wherever I go. So, when I'm off to have personal time with the Lord, or head to church, I can grab up this one small book. But, I know of many women who keep their sermon notes and quiet time reflections in their home management folders. I also have a "pocket planner" that I keep in my diaper bag. This way, I have any phone numbers or other information handy as needed. If you are a visual person and would like to see examples of others' folders, you might be interested in visiting Keeping the Home ~ right here. If you look toward the bottom left of this particular link, you'll see that Candy has included even more available links under: "Peek Into Others' Binders", where you can get further ideas. Do you have a wall calendar? Really, you should! -- However, there is a danger! DO NOT allow yourself to have more than ONE functional calendar! On this one calendar, you will note appointments, special dates (such as anniversaries, birthdays, etc...), and deadlines for any "running project" you may have going. Using post-it notes all around the house will simply not suit! And the fridge door should only be for your children's artwork and some cute magnets... not things you need to do/remember! Things fall off, get scattered, become misplaced... or buried. Having more than one calendar used for information becomes problematic. If your husband, let's say, writes an important date on one calendar, and you note an appointment on a different one... you might forget to attend one thing, or schedule too much for one day. Possibly things will overlap. Either way, there will be stress and conflict! At the beginning of each new year, sit down with a new calendar and write down everyone's birthdays and anniversaries. I always regret when I fail to do this! If I hang a calendar, telling myself I'll note these days, later... I somehow rarely do. And, definitely, put the calendar in a useful spot. By the phone, for example, with pens nearby! By now, you realize there are three major "helps" to organizing your workday:
If you can situate your weekdays so that you know things can and will be accomplished, you will have won the biggest battle. You will have freed up time to spend on bettering other areas of your life such as what we will be discussing in future "entries" in this series. The most important of which is deepening our walk with God. In the meantime, spend some time creating a plan for yourself. Sit down, the very next time you find you have some quiet, with a steaming cup of tea and a notebook. Decide when you're the most "energetic", and be realistic as you set daily chore goals for yourself. Create a chore chart/schedule for your able children. Pull together the items/information you need for a productive Home Management Binder and create it. And, choose a calendar for your family, and hang it for use! God bless you as you continue your journey toward godliness!
HELPFUL BOOKS I RECOMMEND:
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