Home Sweet Simple Home

Sweet Sixteen- So Happy Together

  My beloved is mine and I am his!
~ Song of Solomon 2:16a

On Friday Mr. Steady and I celebrated our 16^th wedding anniversary.
It never ceases to amaze the two of us that our love continues to grow each year. God has blessed us immeasurably.
We have been together for almost 20 years- meaning I have spent more of my life with him than without him.
In honor of 16 years of marital bliss…
I have revamped a previous post from my archives.
I am what he has made me.
My husband enjoys telling me I’m beautiful. He takes great delight in it. I must admit that when we were first married, I didn’t handle his compliments well and would too often off-handedly say things like, “Oh, no I’m not.” Or “I’m too fat.” Or “Did you not see the big zit on my nose?!” or “You’re just saying that because you want something.” Or “Are you blind?” …. Often I would mean it in a sarcastic way and other times I simply meant what I said. Besides my family, Mr. Steady was the first and only boy to tell me I was beautiful. Oh, I’d been told I was cute, I was pretty and such… but not beautiful. Beautiful has a whole different meaning. I never felt it…
When I was about 13, a very pretty and sharply dressed lady from my church said to me, “Amy, you’re such a pretty girl. Too bad you walk like a cow.” Ouch doesn’t even begin to cover it- to this day that comment haunts me. I allowed it to affect me in a very deep way. I thought to myself that I could be a pretty girl but I’d never be more than that because I walk funny.
Needless to say, it was very difficult for me to even begin to believe I was beautiful… until I took the time to really look into my husband’s eyes and see me in a whole new way. In my husband’s eyes, I am beautiful even when I’ve got a zit on the end of my nose or am retaining water or feeling blah… because he looks at me with his heart- He sees me as a whole package- both inside and out and what he sees is beautiful to him. So when I would rebuff his compliments or make sarcastic retorts I was, in a sense, telling my husband his love for me isn’t enough. I was telling him I didn’t want it or believe in it. With those thoughts I had a shift in perspective.
I am reminded of an article in a magazine I read a few years ago, the article started with a story about a group of men who were sharing pictures of their families and one man didn’t want to show a picture of his wife. When asked why, his response was “My wife isn’t pretty anymore.” After a moment of awkward silence an older man came up, put his arm around the other man and said, “She is what you made her.”
I finished reading the article but I can’t really tell you what the rest of it said as I focused on that line- She is what you made her. Wow. That explains it! My husband says I grow more beautiful the longer we are married and now I know the secret. I am what he makes me. Besides God, my husband is the most important and influential person in my life. What he says and how he treats me has a lot to do with what I think of myself. He thinks I’m smart and beautiful- so I am. I know that I am only getting a glimmering glimpse of what I am to him- if I could really see the me I am in his eyes I am sure that I would be shocked and totally humbled. Much more so than I am now.
Because of his love for me and how he treats me and shows me that love I am a better person- I want to be a better person. I want to shower him with love and affection to show how much he means to me. I desire to be beautiful for him!
If a mean man can demean his wife and tell her she’s ugly/fat/dumb after years of this she will, with all probability, begin to believe it to be true. She will undoubtedly begin to look/act the way he has portrayed her. So shouldn’t it work the opposite way? If our loving husbands tell us we are beautiful, lovely, smart, and sexy shouldn’t we begin to believe it?! Shouldn’t we hold our heads high with confidence and begin to look the part?! A smile alone will add to our face value!
On our anniversary, he made sure to tell me more than once that he loves me more today than he did when we were married 16 years ago. He remarked on how our love has grown and improved over the years. And yes, many times, he told me how very beautiful I am.
… After almost 20 years together, he still makes me blush when he says it.
I am what he has made me.
Beautiful.

Just in case

"Forget about what's happened;
don't keep going over old history.
Be alert, be present.
I'm about to do something brand-new.
It's bursting out! Don't you see it?"
- Isaiah 43:19 (The Message)

This year-- Constantly & Consistantly Abiding

Too Busy
Sometimes it flashes in my mind to have a word for the year … I’ve seen others do it and it inspires them …
I file it under “Good Intentions” and continue on with life as I know it …
However, looking back on the last 2 years, the 2 years I really thought about that Word for the Year … each year had it--
2008- The Year of BE STILL
2009- The Year of CHANGE
And now- here has rolled in a brand new year- fresh, crisp, new and mostly unmarred (it is the 6^th after all) …
What will your name be, 2010?
A word, a wonderful, fitting word that will encompass the year and be a focus also …
Its gotta be special and perfect …
Whew- this is nerve-wracking! What if the word I pick doesn’t fit?

Thinking- here’s a list of words, I’ve considered:
Confidence
Vision
Dream
Delight
Little is Much
Wait
Joy
Gladness
Strength and Courage
Trust
Tender Mercies
Abundance

---- All good but none really say, “Its me! I’m your word!”
Until, reading some treasured verses—this word came
Abiding

God is able to make all grace abound to you,
so that in all things at all times,
having all that you need,
You may abound in every good work.
-2 Corinthians 9:8

I am the vine and you are the branches:
If you abide in Me and I in you,
you will bring forth much fruit.
-John 15:5

Abide--- to stay; reside; continue firm or stable; to tolerate; bear; wait for
Abiding—lasting; enduring
Abound--  to be in great plenty; abounding – plentiful
Abundance--- ample sufficiency; great plenty; overflowing

Oh the possibilities- a year of abiding will bring.
Sounds like there will be good things, very good things, and yet- I know there will be struggles I will have to endure, pain I will have to bear, trouble I will have to tolerate.
I can do it.
I will Abide.

Fresh and New

  Another fresh new year is here...
another year to live!
To banish worry, doubt, and fear;
to love and laugh and give!
-William Arthur Ward

And so we have closed out another year.
A time of pondering …
and reflection.
2009
What a year.
I am most thankful to see it drawing to a close.
I am also thankful that this year that started out so badly is ending so much better.
God has brought us through so very much this year.
Quitting my job and all the horror and pain that entailed.
Changing churches.
Finding our wonderful church family- right under our very noses.
Coming to terms with most of the hurt and pain the year started with.
Homeschooling all 3 of the kiddos.
Learning to wait.
To ask and seek.
And to wrap it all up with a sparkle- Someone I dearly love has gifted me with a very special hush-hush secret.  Shhhh.
2009 was not all wonderful and rosy- even right towards its end there was pain—
still is.
But this secret is so incredibly special that the darkness dims because of it.
Isn’t that wonderful!
God knew the “stuff” of 2009 would happen and He chose a year-end wrap-up to  my year in such a way that I can’t help but smile at the gloriousness of it all.
God is so great- so huge and all-encompassing
and yet …
He cares so much for me- knowing that I didn’t want the year to end with the pain and suffering of the previous year- that I didn’t want to carry that into 2010 like we had to in 2009.
Thank you Lord for the fresh fullness of this bright and shining new year.
I know there will be hurt and pains aplenty as well as unspeakable joys and thrilling cherished pieces of goldenness.
I am looking forward to it.

How precious it is, Lord, to realize
that you are thinking about me constantly!
-Psalm 139:17

Precious Golden Moments

Each birthday is golden.
A treasure to be cherished.

Maiden’s  birthday was tremendously special. 13 on the 13^th …
Her Golden Birthday.

Oh, how she sparkled. We had 4 days of Birthday Fun and Madness. Friday nite she had her 2 besties over for a slumber party—spa time, movies and loads of laughs on Saturday. We also had a special time of bible study together. I wrote a short study on True Beauty and shared it with the girls. Awesome discussion- these girls are awesome. I am so thankful she has such like-minded friends with hearts for God.
Sunday was the big day- wakened by the family to a bed full of balloons and streamers. Presents while in pajamas. Special breakfast- a table set with gold. Her request- eggs in a basket, crisp bacon, mixed fruit salad and orange juice. Off to church- where she received an abundance of well wishes and a surprise- her Auntie and Uncle (my sis & hubby) came to church with us!
The extended family was coming for a birthday luncheon. Her Daddy touched her deeply by surprising her with a big bouquet … he told her, “Your first flowers should come from no other man than your Daddy.”

We accented the party with golden decore and the videos from her babyhood playing in the background. Luncheon menu: Daddy’s chili, Mama’s white chicken chili, corn chips and homemade cornbread, Aunt L’s special cheesy bacon dip and homemade bread, Uncle D’s Bacon Wrapped Goodness (Maiden’s name for bacon-wrapped mini sausages with brown sugar) and for birthday dessert:

Chocolate Sour Cream Cake with White Chocolate Sour Cream Icing topped with golden sprinkles.
And ice cream.
Needless to say- we ate very well.
The best part of all was the box of letters.

Six weeks before her birthday- I sent out missives to people who have been important in Maiden’s life, requesting that each write a special birthday letter to my daughter. I asked everyone to note the positive/godly traits each sees in her life, to share special meaningful scriptures, reminiscences and hopes for her future. As each letter came back to us, I put it in a special decorated photo box until, by her birthday, it was a stack of approx. 30 letters. One from the Sunday School teacher who led her to Christ, many from family members, one each from her new youth pastor and our senior pastor’s wives,  a MOPS mentor mom who has watched her grow, dear homeschool moms, mommas of her best friends, letters from best friends, past caravan teachers, a friend of her momma’s who has watched her grow from a sprout to a young lady who now babysits for her … some were funny, some were touching teary-ness, some were both … all were cherished …
what a lovely pile they all became.
Towards the end of her family party, we presented her with the box and I read aloud the letter I wrote my darling daughter. It was a joyful moment—an at least three Kleenex moment. She was stunned.
Later on, she sat next to me and read thru the whole stack. Alternating between laughing and crying. Her Grampy, my dad, known to be a man of few words, wrote her 2.5 pages from his heart. We both cried.
What a glorious and blessed day for her. And for us.
And to think that wasn’t all …
Monday was her annual Birthday Field Trip. Topped off by the fact that her Auntie Em and Uncle D came with us 5 to an awesome public museum about 90 minutes north of us. Not to be forgotten- her Daddy took the day off too- he hasn’t worked a single birthday for any of his kiddos- a tradition he started that I absolutely cherish, and so do they.
The museum was incredible! The draw was a special Leonardo Da Vinci “In Motion” exhibit that Maiden wanted to see (she studied Da Vinci 2 years ago in school).
What absolute birthday bliss!
and now … this momma is beat … tired but happy, thinking its gonna take the rest of the week to get things back to normal …
glad Christmas break is just around the corner.
Whenever that girl doubts herself, thinks that nobody loves her or cares … when she’s lower than low … she’ll open that box and read …
And be reminded.
And know.

Photos:
a table set for a golden breakfast
Thanks for the beautiful flowers Daddy!
The Cake!
Her box full of letters

Cold on the outside, toasty on the inside

  The morning was cold and disagreeable...
- Meriwether Lewis

Oh, my! It was brutally chill this morn. Snow, ice and blowing winds. Ick. It has warmed up a few degrees but when those degrees still keep it below zero with the wind chill- you just don’t feel any warmer. Thankfully we have no where we have to be today.
This is definitely soup weather … bean with bacon tonight along with some thick slices of homemade bread. We borrowed White Christmas from the library. Sounds like a great family evening.
In fact we were able to make last nite a good family nite as well …
In the striving for something different, yet meaningful --
we had supper by candle light last nite.
Mr. Conductor thought it was wonderful.
It was a bit hard to see what we were eating but the kids thought it was great fun.
A nice change of pace.
Better said- a much needed change of pace.
Maiden even did the supper dishes by candlelight.
After supper we decided to climb right into our jammies, grab pillows and blankets and make ourselves comfy and cozy to watch …
It’s a Wonderful Life.

And it is--- Oh yes it is!

Circumstances, pity parties, linoleum and JOY

… Joyful and glad in heart for all
The good things the LORD has done …

– 1 Kings 8:66

My word I didn’t realize it had been so long since I last posted. Computer time is not high up on my list these days …
I have been busy preparing for a very special 13^th Birthday for my oldest daughter. Not only is it her 13^th birthday but it is her Golden Birthday- so we are planning a very special day for her.
Besides birthday preparations, we’ve got the regular homeschool schedules, plus extra field trips, regular every day family life with all its quirks and mishaps and fun ….. Christmas planning, grocery shopping, cookie baking, gift making and on and on.
Not to mention that Mr. Steady was just diagnosed with Shingles. Stress can cause and aggravate Shingles and Mr. Steady is one of the steadiest, calmest men I know and yet …. He has it and I don’t. Of the two of us … we both would have thought this was something I was definitely more in danger of ….
So- it is obvious to me that I need to do my best to make a calm, stress-free home for my husband and that includes a calm, stress-free (as possible) Christmas season.
So far I haven’t accomplished much on the stress-free end. The last few days have definitely allowed for some coal to end up in my stocking … It had been awhile since a Mommy melt-down occurred here- up until Monday that is … I did apologize to everyone and then put myself in time out for a long while.
I have been letting my circumstances dictate my joy. For shame, for shame. I’ve been allowing life’s difficulties to dog me and press on me. Been wanting to just have one big ole’ pity party for myself.
When in truth- there is nothing pitying about it. I am so incredibly blessed.
As I was sweeping the kitchen floor today and was about to lament in my head about the 1970s linoleum flooring, with its grunge and pock-marks and scrapes and how I can’t afford new and how many other things seem in need of repair or replacing around here … and then, instead- I thought how sturdy my home is as the wind whips and blows today. The windows may rattle but they hold. The floor may be scarred but it is solid. My frustration began to melt as I thought to myself that most of those pock-marks and scars were made by my family through the every-dayness of life. This home is battered and scarred and weathered and worn but it holds treasures of life inside. It has sheltered, protected and provided haven for us.
I am blessed.
I may not have the best of everything but I can make the best of what I do have and remember…
I am blessed.
I stood there on that kitchen floor with broom in hand and right then and there decided that circumstances would not best me. My joy comes from the Lord, not from new flooring! Or any other “things” this earth can provide. I stood and prayed there in my kitchen, thanking the Lord for all He has given me and humbly asking him to forgive my wandering eye- I went looking elsewhere for what only He can provide.
I am not as stress-less or as joy-full as I wish to be but I’m better than I was yesterday or even earlier today. I still have my long to-do list that isn’t getting to-done in as quick a fashion as I would like but I won’t slip into the pitiful again. I will accomplish all that God has decided for me today and set the rest aside.

Last nite- after dinner, when the big snow flakes were flying … we let the kiddos throw on coats, gloves and boots and go out for a night time snowball fight. I loved the spontaneity of it and so enjoyed the sound of their laughter. I just had to catch them with a couple of photos.

Its raining, its pouring, mama wants to be snoring

Full to overflowing- contradiction

Its Friday.
What a week its been. So full.
It does, however, make my wish for some quiet and a low key evening . . . . haven’t really had one of those this week.
I am thankful, oh, so thankful for the gifts of friends and family.
Spending time with them all this week. Living life with them.
Isn’t that just one of the neatest gifts God gives us?
Family.
Our regular Friday nite family nite is being pre-empted by fun times with old friends this evening. I am looking forward to it . . . . .
I am an extremely extroverted person,
a people person,
a social butterfly . . . .
But I also long for quiet, for snuggling, for a good book and a cozy blanket.
And perhaps a cup of tea to go with it.
For curling up on the couch with one of my kiddos, turning out all the lights and having family movie nite together- laughing our heads off . . . .
I find the older I get the more I need the quiet together times to offset the exuberant crowds of people times.
I am a living contradiction.
But that’s okay.
I do believe it adds to the zaniness.
It does make one look forward to Sabbath Rest.
Come Sabbath.
Come Rest.

You Say Its Your Birthday- Lets Celebrate Me!

a wonderful nite of fire light

The weather turned a bit to the warm side earlier this week and so we spent our evenings outside enjoying it. Monday nite we had a family bonfire and nighttime gator rides at my parents’ home. Lots of starlight and firelight. A thick homemade soup, fire-cooked hot dogs and creamy pumpkin ice cream for dessert.
Tuesday evening found Mr. Steady working to put plastic up on our 100+ year old windows with bits and pieces of help from the children (that is when they weren’t running around in the leaves). We decided it was too lovely to stay inside and so the supper I had cooked and the table I had set was simply brought out to be enjoyed around the fire.
How completely wonderful to fill a speckled enamelware plate with a heaping helping of homemade chicken and noodles, a slice of bread and butter, a scoop of buttered mixed veggies and a pickle. With a tin cup of apple cider to wash it all down. And balancing it all on your lap as you sit around the fire. You do know that everything tastes better beside a fire. And family conversation seems to last longer. Jokes are funnier, stories sillier, loving is more lovely . . . . .

The kiddos enjoyed foot races and Mr. Steady helped them to rake a course outlined with leaves. So much fun to watch them run willy-nilly in order to stay within the boundaries. So silly too.
It is moments like these that fill my heart clear up to overflowing. We are so blessed.
Thank you Lord.

Big enough and life with the turkeys

Is Your God Big Enough?
HT: www.mikeysFunnies.com

One day on the way home from church a little girl turned to her mother and said, "Mommy, the preacher's sermon this morning confused me."
The mother said, "Oh! Why is that?
The girl replied, "Well, he said that God is bigger than we are. Is that true?"
"Yes, that's true," the mother replied.
"He also said that God lives within us.  Is that true too?"
Again the mother replied, "Yes."
"Well," said the girl. "If God is bigger than us and he lives in us, wouldn't He show through?"

Hmmm. The next thought has to be: Is God showing through me?
and this question:
What kind of God do others see when they look at me and my life?
It is my deep desire that people will see me, get to know me and say to themselves, “Oh, I want what she’s got!”
I want others to see Jesus in me in a real, tangible way—in a way that says, “What she has is spectacularly special and I want some of that. I want that joy and affirmation. I want to know that all consuming love and acceptance.”
Sometimes I forget that I am set apart and should act it.
Some days I doubt I look much different.
There are some days when the look on my face says, “stand back 10 paces and do not even attempt to speak to me. You have been warned.”
I believe every day needs to start with an attitude check.
I believe I need an attitude check more than once a day.
A LOT more than once a day.
I start my day with the best of intentions and then I get up . . . .
My mom had a saying, “Some days it takes all you can do just to keep up with the turkeys.”
As a child, I found that statement odd.
Now as an adult I understand it. She would often say this too: “Don’t let the turkeys get you down.”
I use to think she had some type of fixation on turkeys . . . . .

Spotty posting=busy family life

Dear Readers,
I know my posting has been spotty at best. I do so miss writing. Lots of posts are percolating in my mind but I haven't had enough time to sit at the computer and put them out there for all to read.
Our days have been incredibly busy with some events we hadn't forseen. Mostly good things but some that weren't so great also. But by the grace of God . . . . .
Schooling is going well. Very busy with all of that. The girls are finishing up their studies of the Civil War, both having written their first papers for the year and are doing well. Mr. Conductor and I are studing Ancient Rome this week. We read about gladiators today. His reading is taking off and we are enjoying some wonderful seasonal books as Read Alouds right now. Too Many Pumpkins is a favorite of both of us. Makes me want to cook up some pumpkin bread, pumpkin muffins and pumpkin pudding. Sassafras's Read Aloud is On the Banks of Plum Creek. We have borrowed the audio CD with Cherry Jones from the library and are enjoying listening to someone besides Mama read outloud (Mama is especially enjoying this).
We have also begun the next session of our art class our wonderful artist/volunteer instructor. I am now not only observing the class but participating with my children. My mother has joined us too. We just started watercolor painting last week. What fun! We traced and began painting fall leaves this week.
I have always wanted to add watercolor painting to our nature journals (mine included). What a blessing this is to us.
I am currently trying to pull rabbits out of a hat with our budget- especially for groceries. It seems like I am having to update my price notebook every time I go to the store. Prices keep creeping up, ten cents here, twenty cents there- and it all adds up . . . .  I haven't posted a weekly menu with costs because of this- it simply takes too long to put it together. Instead I am using rough estimates here at home to keep on track as much as possible. While I'm on the subject of groceries- I was really aggrivated when coming home from the grocery store last week, putting items away and I noticed the packaging was smaller. When I put the box of cereal next to the previous (almost finished) box- it was slightly smaller and 4 oz. smaller. The bags of egg noodles- ten cents more and 4 oz. lighter. Sigh.
My creative juices are running a bit low- I figure I have gotten as creative as I can with the budget . . . . I'm not worrying though- God knows.
We are thankful it is soup and bread season. That helps keep the costs down too. On the first day of October I made a delicious soup called "October Bisque" that had canned pumpkin in it. Yummy with warm crusty bread slathered with butter. I hope to share the recipe at some point . . . . .
Well, I must be off. Time to do Latin studies with my girls.

Better ending than beginning

Ugh. Is it okay to not like being me today?

Being a stinker and the pity party that goes with it

I am in need of an attitude adjustment.
Perhaps all the go-go-go of this month has finally hit me . . . .
And then I say to myself- is that a reason or an excuse?
I feel behind. Like so much needs doing and taking care of and I just don’t have the time, energy, money etc.
It looks like we are facing some cha-ching car repairs that will wipe our emergency fund.
And to be honest- it’s upsetting me.
I realize this is what the fund is for and yet . . . . there won’t be any money left for any other emergencies . . . .
And we just had our car insurance and home insurance hiked up. I shopped around and there isn’t anything better than what we have- in fact, another company wouldn’t insure our house because of peeling paint. I don’t have the money to buy paint to pretty up my house in order to get a better discount on my insurance!
I have currently lost my focus- and yes, I admit it- once again I am fretting over money. There is nowhere else I can “get creative with my budget”.
My squirrel fund is gone. Higher grocery prices have stomped on my grocery budget so there’s been nothing to set aside.
Mr. Steady’s pinched nerve necessitated another visit to the massage therapist= $$$. There are projects that need doing before the snow flies and no money and no fit and healthy hubby to do them, Mr. Conductor and I are both currently down to one nice pair of blue jeans each, my favorite bra is fraying . . . . I am having a pity party and I don’t like it much.
I am in need of some encouragement. Most days I can be my own cheerleader but this is not one of them.
I am trying to gain perspective- I know that we don’t have it bad off. I know that there has never once been a time that God has not in some way, shape or form provided for us. I know that it will all be okay. I’m just not feeling it right now.
In fact, I’m feeling like Elijah when he was ticking off on his fingers everything that was going wrong in his life and complaining woefully to the Lord . . . . .
I am working on gaining some perspective.
What do I have to complain about?
My husband has a pinched nerve and hasn’t been himself and hasn’t been able to work on the 20 or so projects we have currently in the works? A pinched nerve is not life threatening- he will recover, he will be okay.
We’re short on funds. Harder to gain perspective here-- as I cringe thinking of what bill will go up next . . . . just have to think to myself- we have enough money for this week.
The car repairs- the problem- there is no heat in my car. Bright side: Well, at least it runs and gets good gas mileage.
One pair of good blue jeans is not an eternal issue. At least the boy has 3 "every day" pairs to see him through most days.
I’m trying to think like Paul and work to learn to be content no matter what my circumstances are.
Another shift in perspective.
I have a home with a roof that doesn’t leak and the house has heat. I have my family and we have our health. The dentist reported today that we are still a no-cavity family . . . . . we are not behind on bills . . . . . there is food in the pantry, in the fridge and in the freezer. There are 3 good books from the library next to my bed. My husband thinks I’m wonderful and for the most part, so do my kids.
I am just being a stinker.
I do believe I need some good laughs. I am thinking I need to just laugh until I cry and then I’ll feel better.
Or perhaps I should just jump right into the crying part.
I’m going to go have a cup of tea.

Finally Home and not leaving here for awhile

Life is good- getting things to done

Good quality to have

Goodness: Free to Be ME!