Home Sweet Simple Home


He satisfies my needs and strengthens me

3:37 PM, 2007-Sep-18 .. Posted in Family Life .. 3 comments .. Link

  I am weary of family strife. Bone weary. Mr. Steady and I have had quite a few discussions lately about what to do about a situation in my family that is greatly troubling and hurting me. It has become obvious that we will have to limit our contact with certain family members for the good of our own little family. I have not wanted to do this and have drug my heals on going to this “extreme” but I can no longer take the pain it is causing me at family gatherings. I can no longer take the pain and confusion it is causing my children. Mr. Steady and I agree that we must do what is best for our little family first and foremost.
Thankfully, my parents are understanding of our need to back away from “extra” family gatherings right now. They are hurt by what is going on but, they, themselves, can not see a way to “fix” it or even make things more tolerable.
There is no talking to the “others”- it’s been tried and it back fired big time.
And so- here I am, hurting for myself and hurting for my children. I am, of course, in prayer about it, as are Mr. Steady and my parents. I pray that God would continue to keep my heart soft- that it wouldn’t grow hard and bitter from the hurt and such that keeps coming. I am praying that if it is necessary (for this to be resolved God’s way) that He would change my attitude concerning these family members and the situation. I am praying that God would help me to let go of my need for vindication and the deeper need of acceptance and support from these family members (they oppose our homeschooling and how we discipline/raise our children which is at the root of this entire business).
When I’ve spent a few days apart from them- I feel better and think that I can take what they dish out but then it’s only a few minutes of being together again in a family setting that I find I can not.
Mr. Steady and I truly desire to follow God’s leading on this and both of us are feeling that pulling away for a season is it. This is extremely difficult for me as I am very close to my family and am still working it thru my mind that my little sister is getting married this Saturday and will be moving an hour away (as opposed to the under 10 minute away I have enjoyed for all these years). So I am quite sad at all these changes but I am reminded that God brings blessings in the midst of difficult times.
My great concern remains that God would continue to help me hold my tongue and not speak my mind—He has helped me thus far and I know He will continue . . . .
God is good.
The LORD will guide you always. He will satisfy your needs and strengthen you . . .
Isaiah 58:11a


Leave a Comment

Untitled Comment

8:38 PM, 2007-Sep-18 .. Posted by Kitty
Oh how I feel your pain. I recently threw my 80 yo fil a birthday party, to which my two sils made a fool of themselves hating me and tormenting me. They laughed at me, rolled their eyes at everything I said and did, and didn't even look at me as I tried to speak to them.
But threw it all I kept my composer, telling my dh after the party that evening, that there will never be another time when I put myself in a situation to have them treat me that way. As for as I am concerned, that was the last time I will ever see those two women. I will no longer be treated this way.
I have turned it all over to God, for I can no longer deal with it. So I do know how you feel about distancing yourself from the pain. You are in my prayers.
Kitty

Untitled Comment

8:43 AM, 2007-Sep-19 .. Posted by gokings13
We have not spoken to dh's mom for 9 years.

I have not spoken to my only brother in years.......and have not seen my parents since last Christmas.
I had to choose my family (dh and kids) over my own......for our sanity, and to STOP the pattern that has been passed down for generations. Patterns of behavior that I do not want passed down to my kids.
It hurts. It stinks.........but it is what is best.
Laura

<i>Untitled Comment</i>

11:27 AM, 2007-Sep-19 .. Posted by Joanne
It is so painful when the people who you love and are supposed to love you treat you badly. There are people in my family that don't like some of the choices that we have made for our family [# of children, homeschooling, etc] but at least they are respectful to our face.

I grew up with an alcoholic father and when my mother passed away, I spent so much time trying to keep some sort of family-ness....but was continually hurt by his actions and by then, my sisters, who had by then turned to alcohol. It engulfed me in such a way that it took me away from my own family. I just realized one day that I needed to let go...let go not of my family, but of the expectations I had of them. We kept in touch, cordially.....but no more family dinners and such. That was 20 years ago and my dad has since passed away...I was able to be there when he died. My sister is still an active alcoholic, but we keep in touch. I have no regrets as to how I handled this situation....I did not reject my family, just their behavior....and put them in a perspective that was best for all.

Edited by Joanne on 2007-Sep-19 at 10:29 AM

{ Last Page } { Page 520 of 1617 } { Next Page }

About Me

"It's no bad thing to celebrate a simple Life."
-Bilbo Baggins

Home
My Profile
Archives
Friends
My Photo Album


View my page on Homeschool Hackers

Links

Gift Baskets From Michigan
The Sparrow's Nest
Pleasant View Schoolhouse
My brother's business blog
Homeschool Buyers Co-op

Categories

101 Things I Love About My Husband
A Year of Abundance
Check This Out
Christmas and Advent
Clean Heart-Clean Home
Crafty Goodness
Everyday Things
Family Life
Financial Bliss
Gift Giving
God is Good
His Help Meet
Holidays
Homekeeping
Homeschooling
in Everything Give Thanks
In the Garden
Leftovers
Menus
One Thousand Gifts List
Proverbs 31 Woman
Quotes and Such
Recipes
The Vitamin Experiment
Thinking Out Loud
Thursday 13
Works for Me

The Wagner Clan

My Husband (DH)-
Mr. Steady

My rock and biggest supporter. The glue that keeps the family sane. He is like deep, deep water- it takes a lot to see a ripple.

DD12- Our Maiden in Waiting- By the world's standard she's a 'tween'. By ours and the Lord's- this is the time of her years of preparation. She is eagerly learning what it means to keep a home and daily becomes more and more of a helper to her Mama.

DD9- Sassafras My Sassy middle child. She holds her own so sweetly and has such an empathetic heart. While real Sassafras is used for flavoring- She is that added sweet flavor to our family.

DS5- Mr. Conductor- The train aficionado in the family. He's the little man and best helper around! He's also the biggest Oreo fiend in the family.

Recent Entries

The fridge is coming home!
We made our own family fun- under $10
Bad Fridge, a loaner & no water in sink faucet
Mini-disasters and where my help comes from
Dropping in with bits of news

Friends Here on the Homestead

HSBPublisher
jenig

tnschaffer
FaithfulAcres
livin4Him6
CountryLiving
belovedlamb
quiverfull
NewHarvestHomestead
quiverfullacres
lancelotacres
CatherineAnn
countrydreamn
wannabeone
annre
kayinpa
mccrjill
TheRusticCottage
KimMC
sunnyflowers
TheLandIsCalling
tioga12
micandme
smmagers
urbanhome
VTLinda
peachyfiglet
heritagehill
MyThreeDaughters
AmyJoBellclapper
oldpathsfamilyfarm
bonnycow
TChannel4
jimnjill
shekinah
erisarei
jwells
happymama
deedee06
robertsroost
Darcy
jackiebridgen
jocelyndixon
PattyMarie
BlueApple

Skylark
Sita
naturalmama
a1health
DakotaSoaplady
cindy
countryheart
2sonsMom
ibuwolf
digbugsgirl
imspecl
hcorbin
Roberta
rashel
Rhen
jennikl9
solodeogloria
CaraDD
paschalhome
Southernangel
hmsteader71
1ladybeale
fcusick
wstoller
keeperofmyhome
TammyLynn
erkopp98
jojatek89
beccasue1029

1Teakettlelavendar
TeacherMom


r-word.org