Lots goin on....sister just got married (they are doin good,by the way) I just got accepted on a traveling volleyball team that im really excited about, my niece karalyce just turned 7 months old, and every thing else under the sun....i'm watchin "elf" right now and its prety funny. well....so long! oh, and if someone would comment on this, that would be awesome cause comments are cool
This is one of the best clean jokes I've seen in
Awhile!
Jesus and Satan were having an on-going argument about
Who was better
On the computer. They had been going at it for days,
And frankly God was
Tired of hearing all the bickering.
Finally fed up, God said, 'THAT'S IT! I have had
Enough. I am going to
Set up a test that will run for two hours, and from
Those results, I will
Judge who does the better job.'
So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed
Away.
They moused.
They faxed.
They e-mailed.
They e-mailed with attachments.
They downloaded.
They did spreadsheets!
They wrote reports.
They created labels and cards.
They created charts and graphs.
They did some genealogy reports
They did every job known to man.
Jesus worked with heavenly efficiency and Satan was
Faster than hell.
Then, ten minutes before their time was up, lightning
Suddenly flashed
Across the sky, thunder rolled, rain poured, and, of
Course, the power
Went off.
Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every
Curse word known
In the underworld.
Jesus just sighed.
Finally the electricity came back on, and each of them
Restarted their
Computers. Satan started searching frantically,
Screaming:
'It's gone! It's all GONE! 'I lost everything when the
Power went
Out!'
Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all of
His files from
The past two hours of work.
Satan observed this and became irate.
'Wait!' he screamed. 'That's not fair! He cheated! How
Come he has all
His work and I don't have any?'
One night a man had a dream. He dreamed
he was walking along the beach with the LORD.
Across the sky flashed scenes from his life.
For each scene he noticed two sets of
footprints in the sand: one belonging
to him, and the other to the LORD.
When the last scene of his life flashed before him,
he looked back at the footprints in the sand.
He noticed that many times along the path of
his life there was only one set of footprints.
He also noticed that it happened at the very
lowest and saddest times in his life.
This really bothered him and he
questioned the LORD about it:
"LORD, you said that once I decided to follow
you, you'd walk with me all the way.
But I have noticed that during the most
troublesome times in my life,
there is only one set of footprints.
I don't understand why when
I needed you most you would leave me."
The LORD replied:
"My son, my precious child,
I love you and I would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffering,
when you see only one set of footprints,
it was then that I carried you."