daily living

Choosing to be thankful

Well, I am going to try to post this again.  I see I was not the only one having trouble over the weekend.

My dh and ds had to work all weekend.  My dh is going to have some very long hours the next month.  On Monday, he was home in the morning which was great as I have not been sleeping very well and after trying to teach a math concept to my youngest, Icalled on my dh.  he was a high school math teacher after all and math is not my strongest point!  he also ended up helping Alex with algebra, which is an area I would rather not go.  All I know is that it was a problem about a foot long with numbers and all these letters!  So I was thankful that he was off for the morning but bummed he couldn't take the whole day since he worked all weekend.  Not that I complained too much, okay whined is more like it :)Then of course, I was reminded that not too many years ago he didnot have a job (out sourced to Canada) and we went through a long layoff.  So, I choose to be thankful!  thank you God.

Anyway, that got me thinking about why we started homeschooling in the first place.  When my dh was in college we already had 2 kids and later in his junior year added another(surprise!!)A difficult pregnancy and year for us emotionally and financially.  I again choose to be thankful, thank you God.  he went to college late(the GI bill)  Our lifestyle was was so hectic and with his school schedule and working 2 jobs he would of never seen the kids, thus began the adventure of homeschooling.

Over the past years, we did put them in school while we lived in a small town.  Alex lasted about a year and half and then begged (with tears) to be homeschooled again.  Jonathan chose to stick it out and returned.  Since then we have moved again and they all went back to homeschooling.  Looking back I wish we had never put them in public school.  There were positives but the negatives out weighed them and I still see the negatives affects, especially on my oldest.  Now this is just us and not everyone's situation or experience.

Anyway, to get to the point: :)  One of the things I like about schooling is the time we spend together as a family (and ok, one of things that is frustrating at times is ALL the time we spend together as a family!) I choose to be thankful!  thank you God. With my husbands schedule the way it is at times, he would not see the boys as much.  it is important to me and to them for dh it be an influence in their lives, to bond with them and teach them the way a man should live. 

I have found myself in a rut in the last few months, some days not as deep as others.  The last few weeks I have not been sleeping well, then one early morning, after tossing and turning and fixating(not spelled right) on all the things that needed to be done and worrying, i started to pray.  Should of done that first, ya thunk???? (feeling pretty dumb)  I fell asleep while praying, but felt better in the morning.  The things I have been worrying about haven't changed yet but i know I am not alone.. God has a plan and a timeline.  So, again I am choosing to be thankful. 

I know for me I can be ruled by my emotions, I am a woman after all :)  But there are times I don't feel loving, kind or thankful (you know all the fruits of the Spirit)  and I am learning to stand up and stomp by foot down and say out loud, I am choosing to be thankful( or whatever thing I am lacking a that particular time)  I did that yesterday and my children raised their eyebrows and looked at me like I was finally loosing it, my dog raised his ears (that make him look like an Austrailian dingo) and cocked his head :)  but I needed to verbally put it out there.

well, all I can say is that today, at this moment I am choosing to be thankful, thank you God! :)

Roberta

P.S. if this doesn't post this time, I am going to be put to the test on my thankfulness and you may hear stomping and yelling, I CHOOSE TO BE THANKFUL!!!!!  :)

Untitled Comment

{ 08:48 , Wednesday, March 21, 2007 } { Posted by MamaDuke }

Good morning! Thankfulness is something we try to remember every single day (especially when we're blind-sided by something). Anyway, hang in there...it'll get better!
MamaDuke