I was rushing out the door, late as always, to take 12 year old son to check out a new Civil Air Patrol Squadron.  He came running back inside calling, "Mom, come quick, there's a little kid out here with more blood coming out of his nose than I've ever seen before!"  I went out to find a 4year old boy with a bloody nose and no sign of any adults around.  Bother!  Why does this stuff always happen when you're already late?  I sent my son back inside to get a couple of wet washcloths and tried to get a coherent answer from the 4 year old boy.  His brother came up then on a bike and I asked where their mom was.  "She's not home.  She went out." 

Me: "Well, who is taking care of you then?"

6 year old "Tabitha is."

Me: "So, where is Tabitha?"

6 year old "I don't know, I can't find her, Maybe she went out."

Me "Go check inside Tabitha's house and your house and see if you can find her."

6 year old "ok"

Well, I mopped up the 4 year old and took him upstairs to the deck of Tabitha's apartment.  It wasn't really too serious just a bloody nose --he had fallen off his bike or slammed into the basketball hoop or something --rather unclear story there.  Little 4 year old stopped crying and fell asleep in a lounge chair.  He had not been showing any signs of concussion so I decided the more pressing need at this point was to find a responsible adult in charge of these children. 

It turns out that the 6 year old couldn't find Tabitha in his apt. or hers.  He said that maybe Amanda, Tabitha's older (13 year old) sister was watching them.  I sent another child to fetch Amanda who was hanging out down at the skate ramp by building 5 (these kids live in building 1).  Well Amanda refused to come saying she wasn't watching those kids. 

At this point the 6 year old, Who I have never seen with a parent ever, starts to cry, "No one is taking care of me, someone's going to come and steal me."  I assured him that he would be cared for and no one was going to steal him.  What else could you say at that point?

I hiked down to speak with Amanda myself, and she informed me that Tabitha was watching them. 

Me "And so where is Tabitha."

Amanda "My mom had to take her to the emergency room becasue she might have broke her arm."

Me "Okay, so then who's watching these kids?  And where is the 2 year old?"

Amanda "I don't know, I think Tabitha's supposed to be watching them."

Me "And the 2 year old, where's the 2 year old?"

Amanda "I don't know, Probably with Tabitha at the emergency room." 

Me "But we don't know that.  The baby could be wandering around this neighborhood, or be drowned in the river?!"

Amanda "Yeah, I guess."

Me "Do you have a cell phone number for their mother or for your mother?"

Amanda "No."

At this point, I'm about ready to call the police.  When a couple of the other teenagers with Amanda say. "We know the kids, we'll babysit them." 

Amanda, "I'm pretty sure Tabitha has the baby with her."

So they all come back to building 5 and hang out with 4 year old and 6 year old while waiting for Tabitha to return.

I offered at this point to take my son to Civil Air Patrol about an hour late.  He said no.  Then a few minutes later I spotted Tabitha out my window with her arm all bandaged up.  I ran out and said, "Do you have Jania (2 yo) with you?" 

Tabitha "No, I'm looking for her right now."

Me, really freaking out now, "You don't have her with you!  Your sister said she was pretty certain you had the baby with you at the emergency room.  Are you telling me, she has been wandering around here for the last hour and a half alone?!!!  She could be drowned in the river or dead by now."

Tabitha, looking pretty worried, "She might be with her mom."

Me "But we don't know that!!!!!"

Tabitha "I'm going to go look for her down here."

At this point we sent the 4 year old to check inside their house again for the baby.  I was still reluctant to start searching through the home of people I don't even know.  Tabitha ran arond the neighborhood looking for the baby and the rest of the teenagers sat around a picnic table "just hanging out."  They were unresponsive and unconcerned about the 2 year old, This was Tabitha's problem cause "She was supposed to be watching them."

So I went to Tabitha and Amanda's house to find their mother, who I had also never seen before.  I explained the situation to her and she said that Tabitha had told her that Amanda was going to watch the children while she went to the emergency room.  "Not according to Amanda," I informed her. 

Just then, a tossled head, sleepy looking 2 year old girl followed her brother out of their apartment.  She had been in their apartment the whole time, at least 1.5 hours, alone, probably asleep, but alone with no one knowing where she was or caring to provide any supervision for her.

Tabitha and Amanda argued about who was responsible and their mom finally sent Tabitha home with the 3 kids to feed them and stay home with them until their mother got home. 

It appears that the final story was that, the kids mom (quite young herself) had asked Tabitha earlier in the day if she would babysit at 6:00 p.m.  Tabitha agreed.  Then Tabitha had to go to the emergency room with her mother and asked Amanda to watch the kids when they came over, until she got back from emergency.  Then the kids mother and their aunt went out and told the kids to "go over to Tabitha's house,"  without making physical contact with anyone upon leaving (The kids mother denied this the next day when I spoke with her).  So the kids played happily until the 4 year old go hurt and there was no one to go to.  (Incidentally Amanda was right there when he got hurt, saw it and did nothing.  And it's not like she's uncaring, really apparently just clueless.)

I was VERY upset by this whole event.  Should I call the police?  Should I contact Child Protective Services?  Should I ?????  I prayed about it and decided I want to be a positive influence in this neighborhood.  So, I called the American Red Cross and explained that I live in a low income neighborhood where children are caring for children and not doing a very good job of it.  I asked them if they would consider coming on site and providing their Babysitting Certification Course with a good healthy dose of the importance of responsibility at low or no cost for these kids.  No matter what anyone does the problem is not going to go away and my thought is that if we can at least give some of these kids some better skills and responsibility to deal with situations it might help.  Then we need to work on a parenting class!

Anyway, the Red Cross Agreed and the teenagers and their parents are all into it.  So, if nothing else, at least for now, we are going to try to equip the teenagers with a few skills and hopefully some responsibility.  In the meantime, the 2, 4, & 6 year old continue to wander the neighborhood, although not quite as much.  I have now met their mother and will probably continue to do stuff with her kids as long as we live here.

Sadly, this is probably not an uncommon scenario in many parts of America everyday.