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I'm struggling with several situations right now and have sorta thrown my hands up in the air wondering what to tackle first. I know that I am stressed out about it all because the itchy hands are back (this dyshidrotic eczema is very sensitive to stress). I am too busy and involved in too many things and I just took on something else at church yesterday. I feel like I'm drowning. I recently read this,

In an internet article entitled Women Struggle with Choice in Mental ‘Third Shift ,’ the author writes:

“There appears to be no peace for today’s hard-working women, whether they are career women or stay-at-home moms. They never feel completely settled about where they are and what they’ve done. If they are at work, they feel guilty about time away from their children. If they are at home with the kids, they worry about work. The division is exhausting.”

Author/researcher Michele Bolton says,

“Women work three shifts. They work one shift at their workplace, a second shift at home taking care of their families, and a third shift in their minds, conducting a continuous inner dialogue of second-guessing whatever actions and decisions have filled their days…Women are expected to fulfill significant responsibilities and leadership roles at work - prove themselves - and also retain a nurturing, other-oriented role in the family and broader community.”

In other words, too often women are expected to be super women.”

I suspect, however, that it isn’t always others’ expectations of that cause us this stress.

We frequently place this superwoman burden on ourselves.

I think of the Proverbs 31 woman and wonder how she got it all done.

We read about the Proverbs 31 women and expect that to be the prototype for all of us:

“A good woman is hard to find…her husband trusts her…she is never spiteful…she shops around for the best yarns and cottons and enjoys knitting and sewing…she’s up before dawn, preparing breakfast for her family and organizing her day…she looks over a field and buys it, then, with money she’s put aside, plants a garden…first thing in the morning, she dresses for work, rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started…she is in no hurry to call it quits for the day...she’s skilled in the crafts of home and hearth, diligent in homemaking, quick to assist anyone in need, reaches out to help the poor…doesn’t worry about her family when it snows (because) their winter clothes are all mended and ready to wear…she makes her own clothing, and dresses in colorful linens and silks…she designs gowns and sells them, brings the sweaters she knits to the dress shops…her clothes are well0made and elegant and she always faces tomorrow with a smile…she keep an eye on everyone in her household and keeps them all busy and productive…”*

While discussing these words, one female theologian commented:

“Most male preachers forget to mention that this women had a raft of servants at her beck and call, and this description is what a woman can accomplish over an entire lifetime!” 

I obviously need to get rid of some of my commitments and bring my focus back to my family. Our homeschooling is suffering because I have too much outside stuff also needing my attention. My husband told me last night that I needed to focus FIRST on our household and then add in only the BEST activities. I need to seek God's help and advice ALL DAY LONG. I need to pray about my over-commitment and seek HIS will for me and my family.  The article is summed up by the following:

We need to know what Someone other than society, colleagues, or authors thinks of us. And the only one whose knowledge and understanding of us ultimately matters is God. Knowing and believing what God thinks of us, how God views us, helps explode the Superwoman myth because it is in Him that we find completeness and worth.

And what does He think of us?  

Listen to these descriptions of God’s view of us. (Insert your name in the blanks):

“This is how much God loves               : He gave His Son, his one and only Son….by believing in him,               can have a whole and lasting life.”

“God rescued                from the dead-end alleys and dark dungeons. He’s set her up in the kingdom of the Son he loves so much…”

“I know what I’m doing in (your) life. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. When you call on me, when you come and pray to me, I’ll listen.”

“Look at the great love the Father has lavished on you,             , that you should be called a child of God! And that is what you are!”*

What liberating joy it is to discover and believe what God thinks of us!  By meditating daily on God’s view of us and learning what is truly important to be accomplished each day, we will be well on our way to living in the fresh air of freedom.

These are such encouraging words to me today. As you head into the 2nd month of the year, take some time this week to analyze January. Were you too busy? Was your focus in the right place? Are your expectations for YOURSELF too high (mine certainly are!)? Is your family getting "all of you" or just the "leftovers?" What activities & commitments stress you out or are a drain to your family ... prayerfully consider what needs to change.

I'll blog my answers to these questions within a week. Let's remember that it's God first, then family and THEN everything else. And, if God and family are taking a lot of time, all of that "everything else" needs to be very limited. We are not being selfish when we choose NOT to be involved in other things ... we are just getting our priorities straight!

“Father, thank you for your great love and help me remember daily your love and acceptance. Help me correctly evaluate my priorities, work hard at the necessities and leave the results in your hands.”