Top Ten Signs You Know You're Visiting a Bad Church

Posted on Friday 23 June 2006 at 1:24 PM in Just For Fun - Post Comment

I can't remember where I found this, but it seemed fitting for hubby and I as we have recently been searching for a home church.  Good for a chuckle...and thought provoking.  Are in the church where God wants you...or where you are comfortable and want to be?

Top Ten Signs You Know You're Visiting a Bad Church 

10.) The usher asks if you prefer the smoking or non-smoking section
9.) Foyer includes beverage machines to give you a choice of soft drinks, Snapple, bottled waters, and exotic coffees.
8.) Regular attendees earn frequent flyer miles
7.) Sunday School replaced by an extreme image make-over class with Dr. Phil
6.) Baptismal tank has a wave-maker machine installed
5.) Twenty dollar cover charge at the door
4.) Sign out front has latest pastors name written with dry erase markers
3.) Offering plates mounted with credit card swipers
2.) Worship team performs their favorite Led Zeplin medley; with an altar call of "Stairway to Heaven."
1.) Banner across front of sanctuary reads, "Today's Worship Service Brought to You by Chevrolet."

Romans 15:4-6
4 For whatever things were written before were written for our learning, that we through the patience and comfort of the Scriptures might have hope. 5 Now may the God of patience and comfort grant you to be like-minded toward one another, according to Christ Jesus, 6 that you may with one mind and one mouth glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Untitled Comment

Posted by abmiller on Friday 23 June 2006 at 3:25 PM - Link

That was cute! I'm going to share it with my hubby who's also a Pastor!

~Anissa