Angie's Answer

Christmas is upon us...

   Well, Christmas is upon us and praise to God-I am ready.  All the gifts are wrapped and ready to be placed under our tree.  Clothes are all washed and ready.  The turkey is in the bottom of the refrigerator; even though I am still going to have to put it in a sink of cold water for it to truly thaw.  The candies are made and the cookies are baked.  I do have some breads to make---honey whole wheat and pumpkin.  Anna's dog, Daisy, has even had a bath.  I will probably run the vacuum cleaner and dust tomorrow, so everything is nice, neat and fairly clean.  So, prayerfully, things will go well on the 25th.

   Seth is so excited!  He has had a good week.  His neighborhood friends have been home from school, so he has some of his friends to play with.  Daisy, the dog, also has been playful and occupying Seth out in the backyard.  Seth built a little fort in the back of the yard and has been playing war in it.  So, he has had a pretty good week.  I am so glad, because having what Dr. Lehman calls a "Lonely Only" is not easy for mom.  He spends so much time alone and he is a typical 11 year old people person type of young man.  So, again I am so very glad that he has had a good week before Christmas.  Smiling...

   Today has been a pretty good day.  Calm and restful.  I didn't have any anxiety until about 6 pm, but it soon passed.  I have been reading a devotional by Emile Barnes, and it has been so very helpful.  There was a quote in my reading today by Billy Graham.  It was: "Anxiety is the natural result when our hopes are centered in anything short of God and His will for us."  This ministered to me this evening while I was beginning to feel anxious.  While I was reading this I immediately examined what I was thinking that was making me anxious--once I figured it out and realized that "it" was not my responsibility and looked to God for help.....the anxiousness went away.  Whew!  Now, I feel fine.   God is so good!

                                God Bless!!

Quilt Exchange - Winter Theme...Update

I just wanted to post a quick update to those who are still participating in the quilt block exchange. 

It seems our finally tally for participants were 5 folks.  The packages of exchanged blocks were mailed last friday, Dec 19th. 

I had originally suggested to finish the project and then once ALL projects are finished, we can post them on the website, BUT I have found that not everyone plans to start on the project immediately due to various things going on and LIFE in general.  SO we can just approach this in a more leisurely manner.  Whenever you finish the project of your choice, just send your finished pictures to Chas, Senior Editor and she can then post them here on the website at that time.  We do not have to wait for everyone to finish the projects. 

Thank you to all who were involved with the first Quilt Challenge with theme WINTER!  This certainly has been interesting to say the least!  If you had to drop out, please do not beat yourself up.  LIFE and CIRCUMSTANCES can get in the way of planned events, that's just how it goes sometimes.  Feel free to participate again in the future. 

Communication is the key to success for this event, so ladies, I look forward to the 2nd Quilt Challenge being even better than the first!  INFO COMING SOON!!!

Merry Christmas and GOD BLESS YOU!

Teresa

Still no panic!...

   I am still panic free!  And this has allowed me to be very productive today!  I am taking a break from vacuuming and mopping to blog about not having even one attack of anxiety!  Oh, what a wonderful day!!  Now, this doesn't mean that I am not taking my valerian, vitamin B or Calmag, but I have been on all this and still had panic attacks.  Today has been great!

   I have finished all my wrapping, gone through some paper piles, taught Anna how to hem pants on a sewing machine, baked, made some candies, cleaned my kitchen, cooked supper, recleaned my kitchen, and now I am vacuuming and mopping the floors!  That is alot for me to do here lately.  I don't think I am going to bake anymore today.  I will do that tomorrow.  I want to relax this evening.  I have a tendency to over do things, so I think I should slow down and take it easy.  Donnie, my husband, thinks I am doing too much today, so I had better slow down.  He has been so worried about me, but I am feeling like my old self again!  Sighing happily...

   I just wanted to thank everyone who has been praying for me and leaving comments.  I have gleaned much and appreciated everything everyone has said.  I just wanted to shout this from the mountain top, but since I live near the beach...........my blog will have to do!

                           God Bless!!

NO PANIC ATTACKS TODAY!...

   This has been a wonderful panic free day!!!  Praise God from whom all blessings flow!!!  The sun is out and I have been filled with the presence of the LORD, energy and the desire to bake.  Which, of course, I have.  Everything seems so much brighter, lighter and more lovely--all because I am not shaking in my skin.  What a blessed relief!

   Yesterday, Sunday, Seth was in a small church play.  He was Joseph.  He did a wonderful job, and I was so very proud of him.  This little eleven minute play touched my very spirit and I believe it has produced some Christmas spirit within me.  Again, Praise the LORD!!  So, when I came home, I started wrapping Christmas gifts.  I was able to do most of them--I have a few more to do this evening. It is definitely going to be a smaller Christmas (gift wise), but hopefully everyone will see the love of Jesus and be blessed.

   Today has been filled with baking and cookie making.  I made some of my raisin candy, peanut candy and 7 layer cookies.  Anna made some of the most wonderful split pea soup this afternoon.  Donnie does not care for it, so I do not make it.  Now, he is the only one who doesn't like it, so Anna made some and it was delicious!!  Even Seth liked it, and he doesn't like anything green!!  Maybe now I can have it more often.  Yum yum!

   I would like to make some sugar cookies before the day is done.  Plus, I need to clean the house.  I think I will delegate some of my chores to my family so we can be done in short order.  Then we can relax and watch a Christmas movie tonight. 

   Anyway, I am thrilled that there are no panic attacks to report!  And I do hope your day is a wonderful as mine has been!!  Thank you, Abba.

Ham in the oven...

   Today and yesterday have been fairly nice and with only anxiety-not full blown panic attacks.  This has been a much needed break for my almost constant torment.  I am actually breathing normal, my leg is not shaking and I have a smile on my face--a true gift from God!

   Yesterday when I woke up-I was almost giddy because there was no panic.  Many chores were done before going to Marianne's for coffeehouse.  I did start shaking at M's home, but five CaMag's took the edge off and I was able to enjoy Kate's birthday and my friends.

   It seems that each one of us are going through a trial of some sort. Children, money, marriage, moving, anxiety--all of us are tired and feeling somewhat broken.  I guess God is working on us all at the same time!!  Yikes....

   Today, Donnie, Seth and I went out to do some errands.  I caught a few sales on ham and turkey, as well as, a few veggies and some shrimp.  We just did our running around and enjoyed being together.  It was fun.

   I have now straightened the house and put a ham in the oven.  The Beale Bungalow is beginning to smell great!  I would like to make some Puppy Chow and some more candy this evening, but we will see.

   I am trying really hard to get into the Christmas Spirit, but alas, I am just going through the motions this year.  Maybe because I am so tired from all these panic attacks--I believe they have left me quite exhausted.  Yesterday evening, I curled up on the couch and was asleep at eight!  Then I got up at eleven and went to bed--I slept all night.  There just doesn't seem to be any energy, but I will keep up the pace (which is slow) for Seth's sake. 

   I do feel peaceful at the moment though.  I am quietly enjoying my Saturday afternoon.  Anna and her family have gone out for a bit.  Seth is out back playing with all his friends.  I am just piddling around the house.  This is one of my favorite pastimes.  Just picking up here and putting away there.  I really need to wrap some gifts, but I will wait until later. 

   Well, I think I will finish piddling in my room and then go and peel some potatoes.  Oven baked Smithfield Ham, fried potatoes and onions, butterbeans and hot rolls are on the menu for tonight.  Tomorrow, I may ask Anna to make some split pea soup for our Souper Sunday Supper.  Doesn't that sound yummy? 

Friday Dec 19th

Homemade Christmas Ornaments from Cathedral Window Quilt Pattern

Well readers, due to my inbox being filled with requests for more posts, I am here again today to write to you.  OKAY, OKAY, so it was actually just ONE person...AND she is my MOTHER, my most faithful reader.  ANYWAY, since she asked why I have not posted in such a long time, I decided to write a short post.

TOPIC:  Homemade Christmas Ornaments from Cathedral Window Quilt Pattern

Above are three different ornaments I have made over the years using the Cathedral Window Quilt pattern.  The first picture is my middle sister's BEAUTIFUL tree this year.  The last ornament is for "baby's first Christmas".

My dad loves to go to a store called "The Samaritan Center" which is similar to Good Will stores.  He often finds craft books for me and in one of these old dusty books is where I got the inspiration for these ornaments.  See MOM...sometimes he does find treasures there!  lol...we often joke that we should secretly pack all the things away that he has bought from there over the years and donate it back so he will have something to buy again. 

I have also used the Cathedral Window pattern as the front of a handbag, but I cannot find a picture of it on my laptop.  Since I am still in West Virginia, it is the only thing I currently have access to find files.  ANYWAY, try to envision 4 cathedral window blocks put together as the front of a purse.  I had used blue material w/silver snowflakes imprinted on it for the material, then for the center squares, i had embroidered dark blue snowflakes onto white material.  The purse was also made in the blue w/snowflakes material.  I will try to find a picture soon.

The baby pics were made using the special solution for fabric that makes it photoready.  It is called Bubble Jet Set 2000.  Click here for the website to purchase the complete kit. 

I used my embroidery machine to sew out the year, but this could also be done by hand embroidery.  Just make sure you make your year small enough that it is not covered up when you sew it into the window.

If you do not know how to make a cathedral window quilt pattern and would like to know, leave me a comment.  If there is interest, then I will do a small tutorial for you.  I have found that it is nowhere near as complicated as I have always heard it is!

I hope everyone has a MERRY CHRISTMAS!

God Bless You!

Teresa 

 UPDATE:  I searched old emails and found two pics with the snowflake purse attachment and the purse itself...neither show a very good pic of the finished purse, but it at least gives you a visual to go along with my explanation above...

AND here it is hanging up in my sewing room:

Another gray and cloudy day...

   It seems like days since we have seen the sun!  I think I might be a little down because of Seasonal Affective Disorder.  I am not the only one.  I thought the sun was supposed to come out today, but we are supposed to have cloudy skies.  Rain the rest of the week.  I might do some research on those lights that are supposed to help with this.  I am tired of being anxiety ridden and tired.

   My Donnie hit a cord with me this morning.  I was telling him that the Beale Bungalow felt as though it was closing in on me.  Anna and Will's stuff is everywhere--the Christmas tree takes up a lot of room--there are more people in this little house and I am drowning.  Then my Donnie popped up with-Phil. 4:11, "Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, [therewith] to be content."  Yes, things are not as neat and tidy as we like it.  Yes, the house is crowded, but it is all temporary, and we need to be content in this state that we find ourselves.  Wow!  Talk about rebuke and relief at the same time.  I know that he is right!  So, I am back on the walking in Jesus' Victory/doing the next thing/and now, asking God to help me be content in whatsoever state I am.  Oh, the lessons that I am learning.  Sigh...

   Donnie said that he wants to go to Trader Joe's and get some more coffee.  I have not been drinking too much of the caffinated stuff.  Yesterday, after I got a hair trim Seth and I went over to Starbucks and I couldn't finish my latte.  It really made my heart start to race and that just mimicked anxiety, so I dumped it.  I am going to go decaf for awhile.  I just cannot take these attacks much longer, so I need to make some life changes here.  Now, this is a good thing--I do believe.  (Right now, I am sipping on Chamomile tea.)  So, we will be heading out soon.

   The only shopping I need to do today is for tissue paper, a box for mailing two packages, and a birthday gift.  That is it.  I was going to clean, but that will have to wait until the house is a bit emptier.  Wrapping gifts will be this afternoon.  This evening we are going to see the lights at the Virginia Beach boardwalk.  All of us are going.  I think this will be fun for all.  So, my day is pretty full. 

   I don't mean to use my blog to vent my concerns about my panic attacks, but it does help to get it all out.  I am not perfect, but I am learning everyday to Let Go and Let God handle things.  I have the tendency to take everything on my shoulders and then feel guilty when things do not work out.  Donnie and my pastor, keep telling me that I don't need to take on anything that is not my responsibility.  That is so hard for me because I feel responsible for everything!!    But, God is gracious and full of mercy towards me and us all--elsewise we would all be in hell. 

   Yesterday, as I was looking out my kitchen window I got to thinking-Jesus is sitting at the right hand of God in His Kingdom right now.  Jesus won the victory over death and sin--Oh, death where is thy sting?  But, he had to walk the Via De La Rosa-the way of suffering, to quote a song...suffering has its reward, but suffering is suffering, and it is a powerful tool in the hands of a most gracious King to mold us into His Son's image.  I will make it through this...by the grace of God and God alone. 

Finished Christmas shopping today...

   This morning Anna and I went and finished up Christmas shopping.  Mind you, my list is very small this year.  I was doing fine then my anxiety started to take off.  Anna and I were in Chik-fil-a when they hit.  I immediately stopped eating and prayed--right there in the middle of the place.  Slowly, but surely, my shaking slowed down and I was able to finish my breakfast (this was a special treat for Anna and myself) and continue on with our shopping plans.

   We went to Walmart for a few things; Old Navy was next followed by Game Stop.  Target, JC Penny, Family Christian Store and Sears were also visited by us.  We ended up at BJ's then we went home.  We got some great deals and we're pretty pleased with our purchases.  Home was next.  We were tired!

   After a brief respite Donnie, Seth and I went off.  I went and had 2 inches trimmed of my hair; Donnie went and got some gas for the car.  Will grilled the hamburgers and supper was done.  

   My anxiety calmed down and I was able to enjoy the day.  All day long I have been praying that I would walk in Jesus' Victory.  I have no victory--"For without me ye can do nothing".  This prayer, plus "Do the next thing" has been my focus all the live long day.  I can't wait until I go to bed tonight!  Why?  Because I will be able to know that today I walked totally in victory!  His victory!  There is no way I could have made it through today without Jesus!  My, oh my, what a wonderful Savior I have!!

   The lights are out on my Christmas Tree.  Frowning...  Will is supposed to fix it later.  We have been having this problem this year.  I know what is supposed to be done, so when Will fixes the lights--we will be adding an extention cord to the lights, so only three lights are strung together.  Sigh...  Usually, I would be totally upset about this, but I am not.  Having these panic attacks have helped me to keep certain things in perspective.  

   Tomorrow, I am planning on cleaning the house and wrapping gifts.  It will be a nice day at home.  Anna and Will will probably go off, so there will be less people in the Beale Bungalow and it will be easier to clean.  I do enjoy piddling and cleaning around my home.  I am hoping that I can enjoy tomorrow by walking in Jesus' victory and doing the next thing--just like today.  Sighing with hopeful relief...

   Well, I am getting tired, so I am going to close.  Thank you to all that have left such positive and uplifting comments--they truly have helped and have been a blessing.  Thank you again from the bottom of my heart.

                                    God Bless!! 

Focusing on Jesus...

   Well, I feel a little bit better than my earlier post.  I decided that I needed to go and get some Christmas shopping done.  So, off the the mall I went.  My intention was to get Seth some turtlenecks, but found nothing.  I was getting a bit antsy in the store--it was so hot!  Then I decided to head out into the mall itself.  Sears offered up nothing, but I was able to get something for my daughter, Anna.  Another person marked off my list. 

   As I was heading back the way I came--I started getting antsy once again.  So, I called my brother, Ronnie, who was at work, but he talked to me all the way home.  I was fairly calm when I came in the house.

   I have decided that I am not focusing on Jesus enough.  I don't think God is allowing me to go through all this for no reason.  There isn't a "Let Us Pick on Sharon Day" in God's kingdom.  I just need to do one thing at a time while focusing on Jesus.  Alone time has helped, but it is not getting chores done.  All the chores not being done is causing more guilt, because these are my chores that are not getting done.  I think I am going to take Elizabeth Elliot's advice she gleaned from a poem.