Thunderwolf Ranch

Our eyes were opened

Hubby and I talked last night about the girls and how spoiled they are.  How it came about was we had the roof repair man come over to look at the leak.  He asked why we wanted to build a large house at our ranch.  I told him the home that is there  is only 1082 square feet and this house we live in is feeling smaller to us because we would like the grand babies to have a room just for them.  How many square feet is this house he asked?  1500 square feet.  He said his family of 4 live in a 865 square foot home.  ( I feel bad for looking at a 4200 square foot home). 

Then our daughter Shayna drove up, he asked if that was her truck? I looked at him and said yes.  He just looked at me.  He then asked if Kristi will be getting her own car?  I said yes ,as soon as we can find the truck we are looking for.  Then the girls started talking about what kind of 2 horse trailer they want because our 4 horse is to much from them to  haul just 2 horse or pigs.  The man asked me if we were going to buy them a 2 horse trailer?  I said yes.  He then had a look on his face that said they are spoiled.

It really open my eyes!!  They are really spoiled!!  Most children in a family do not each get their own trucks or a horse trailer.  They would use mom and dads.  They will share a horse trailer though. We do need a two horse trailer, it is not just for them.  When we go to horse shows it is a waste of gas to haul a huge 4 horse trailer with just an Arabian and a pony.

So last night we talked and it was really an eye opener for us both to see that our children have never wanted for anything.  My husband has worked very hard to give us what we need and more.  But we realize we need to change some things.  To see it through some ones else's eyes was the opener.   We are going to change some things.    I am not bragging or anything like that just sharing my growing some more.  It was just a real eye opener.  I mean a real eye opener !! 

God Bless, mj

a different viewpoint

{ 04:02, 2008-Nov-22 } { Posted by kjprice616 }

My husband and I have "spoiled" our kids, too. But we have also tried to teach them gratitude and patience with respect to receiving items they want. For example, we insist on paying cash for everything, so they may get what they want, but later than they want it. They do not experience instant gratification in most instances. We have decided to buy the kids their first car. We can afford to do this for them, but we get to choose what they drive b/c we are the ones paying for it. I don't think we are spoiling them by doing this. Our thought is that we'd rather they spend their time on schoolwork taking Honors and AP classes working towards getting scholarship money than working a job and compromising on their grades. It'll be a bigger payoff in the end when they "earn" money for college. Their job is to help pay for college by studying hard and earning good grades & test scores.

I do not think it's a negative thing to want to live in a larger home. My home is almost 3000 square feet, although we live mostly in the 1900 upstairs living space. I wouldn't trade the space for the world! There is something to be said about not feeling like you are "on top of each other" all the time.

I am not AT ALL trying to change your mind on things. I just wanted to give you my take on the situation. Kids are only "spoiled" if they EXPECT their parents give them everything and have poor attitudes when they do not get what they want. If your children are grateful for what you give them, say "thank you" and do not expect to have it all, then they are just being loved by their parents!

Kris

Untitled Comment

{ 05:24, 2008-Nov-22 } { Posted by Anonymous }

But if we can't spoil our children who will? Having children has been great and we love them so why not give them things? We two great kids 1 boy 1 girl perfect family. It makes me sick to see a family with a ton of kids who can barely afford to feed them let alone spoil them. On another site it was a boys birthday he is the oldest of 12! He and the dad got a good birthday dinner the rest of the kids got crap. Where is the fun in that?

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{ 01:11, 2008-Nov-26 } { Posted by heatherdmc }

A lot of people think we are mean parents because we let the kids work part time. They buy what is in their budget for things they like, as in specific clothing, treats. But we do what we are responsible for as far as the primary things. Bigger items that carry big responsibility is greatly left up to them. Don't you find when you pay out your money and/or time you tend to look at things differently? I value the item I made more than one I walked in and bought.