Here I sit at 7am on a Saturday morning. Am I a masochist? Perhaps. I got little sleep last night. I am still trying to settle into a new place you see. I moved into my new apartment a week ago tomorrow. Even my cats are having a hard time adjusting, they would be why I am up so early. What is it with cats who sleep the day away then keep their humans awake all night? It's a good thing they're cute...
We really are settling in better than I expected. I have a few boxes to unpack still and I need to get rid of even more or aquire a book shelf with cabinets at the bottom to store some things. I have few predilections...books, music and candles, all of which are in abundance in my life. I got rid of many of the above in the process of this move and more will go no doubt but a girl can only rid herself of so much at a time.
The apartment itself is nice as far as apartments go. Small but nice. My new dishwasher was installed yesterday and of course there was fresh paint all around to go with the new carpet. I have one neighbor who I already dislike (she is very nosy and snotty) and another who may die an early death if I hear his country music through my wall at 7am on Sunday morning again. I have ants, the big ones even not the cute little sugar ants we get around here every year. The landlord has been very helpful but I am going to work on my own concoction to rid my place of them. If it works I will post what I did.
The kids and I are still getting new routines figured out and will need to get the chore thing arranged as well. I made the comment to my 8 year old yesterday that they would have to get going on their chores again to which she was quite indignant. I asked her if she thought that because we were now in a smaller apartment if she thought that I would now be taking over all the household chores and she, quite earnestly, said yes. I told her she was smoking crack (a common phrase around here) if she thought she was going to live in my house without contributing. Ah, the joys of parenting. Good thing the kids are cute too, it could mean the end of the human race if they weren't.
Well I best get off my arse and get some oatmeal made and get going. I am taking the kids to my sister in law's house to spend today and tomorrow. I get to (!) go spend the day cleaning my old house. Thank the Goddess for friends, HaphazardHomesteader is coming over to help. I am bring a boombox and some cds so it shouldn't be too torturous. My old landlord has already started painting and if I finish today there's no reason he could sign someone else in and get me a few days of credit back for overpaying rent for this month. I could sure use it.
Have a great weekend all!
Thanks to Kathy for sharing this on her blog:
| A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... One friend who Always makes her Laugh... And one Who lets her cry... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... A good piece of furniture not previously owned by Anyone else in her family... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE Eight matching plates, Wine glasses with stems, And a recipe for a meal that will Make her guests feel honored. A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... A feeling of control over her destiny... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... How to fall in love without losing herself... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... HOW TO QUIT A JOB BREAK UP WITH A LOVER AND CONFRONT A FRIEND WITHOUT RUINING THE FRIENDSHIP... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... When to try harder... and WHEN TO WALK AWAY... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... That she can't change The length of her calves, The width of her hips, or The nature of her parents... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... That her childhood may not have been perfect... but; it's over... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... What she would and Wouldn't Do for love or more... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW.. How to live alone... even if She doesn't like it... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... Whom she can trust, Whom she can't, And why she shouldn't Take it personally... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... Where to go.. Be it to her best friend's kitchen table.. Or a charming inn in the woods... When her soul needs soothing... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... What she can and can't accomplish In a day... A month... And a year... |
|
To live content with small means; to seek elegance rather than luxury, and refinement rather than fashion.... in a word, to let the spiritual, unbidden and unconscious, grow up through the common. This is to be my symphony. |
|
William Ellery ChanningI get these from Gratefullness.org every day in my e-mail. It is strange how many times they pertain to what is going on in my life at the time. I am a firm believer in syncronicity, meaning that I don't believe in coincidence, I believe everything happens for a reason.My soon to be ex keeps commenting on how he is concerned that I won't be able to make it financially once I leave. I keep telling him that I will be fine, I won't have extra money for non-necessities but that we will make due and pare down. This morning he mentioned it yet again. I got irritated this time, told him that I felt as though he kept harping on this to put doubt in my mind and maybe then I would stay. He said that wasn't it so I told him he needed to not bring it up again, I appreciate his concern and he has voiced it more than enough and now needs to drop it.
|
It was quite overcast and chilly today but I headed over to HaphazardHomesteader's house to help prep the garden a bit. Her partner has been collecting loads of horse poo from the place his daughter takes horseback riding lessons for some time. Last year the garden plots were started by the chickens pecking, the ground being dug up and turned over and poo being laid out thickly. This year is no different but in most places the beds are already established. Another thick layer of poo went down and on top of it an old bale of straw was spread out. They'll let the chickens at it again and probably work it under again before planting the starts. We did have some help from the kids today too. My daughter planted the peas and spread manure and my nephew shoveled and spread manure. We worked on what is going to be a bee & butterfly garden, we laid out some long branches for paths and replanted a couple lilacs that will hopefully make it.
Once we were done we headed in for a lovely lunch of black bean chili and corn muffins. We tried to get some crafts made for Pagan Faire which is two weeks from today but accomplished little with our minds being elsewhere today and Michelle coming down with something. I perused Craig's List a little and found a dining room table and four chairs for only $60!! They were in great shape, very sturdy, so I talked Michelle's partner Jeff into taking me to the next town over and helping me haul them to my brothers garage for a week until I move.
I have to say I am more excited about this move than I anticipated I would be. I am jacked about being independant, doing things my way and creating a much healthier, relaxed life for my kids. My soon to be ex is a good enough sort of guy, he just isn't for me. I picked up some dishes at Goodwill last night along with a sturdy basket to keep my cloth napkins in on the center of the table. No more paper napkins for us! I will buy some sturdy material and make some more cloth if need be. I think I may still buy paper towels, we use them so infrequently that I can justify their use. I am going to the store tomorrow to buy more natural dish soap and am going to try this dishwasher soap this time too. There are so many things I want to change, things that I think will make a difference in my family and for the earth. It turns out my apartment complex has no rececyling bins so I either have to save my recyclables and get them someplace myself or complain right off and see if the landlord is willing to get some. He doesn't pay any extra, it is part of the garbage service here.
Time to list more items on Freecycle. I have gotten rid of many things and have much more to go. It will be so nice to have space to move and not feel like my house is closing in on me. 
While I realize this doesn't have much to do with homesteading directly, to me it does indirectly.
You remember in a previous post I talked about a husband that thought I was crazy and was not supportive of my homesteading endeavor? Well over the weekend I told him I wanted a divorce. I am done. I love the man and care about what happens to him but I am not prepared to spend the next 50 years of my life being unhappy. We told the kids and they took it better than we expected. A few questions here and there but they are fine with it. I suppose hearing the arguements and fights over the years made them realize that this is not what any of us needed.
So I am looking for an apartment. It is tough! I don't make much money and the apartment is going to take most of an entire two week paycheck. Guess I better start saving for Christmas eh? I think it will be fine.
The exciting thing is that this puts me even closer to moving to land with my friend HaphazardHomesteader and her partner, I guess husband is the proper term now! We were hoping to find some other like-minded folks to go into this venture with us. We have met a few people and who knows what the future holds. There are quite a few traits, views, ideals, etc that we were looking for....they can be kinda crazy though...consider present company!
I am also excited that this will give me more time in the summer to help her garden. My husband always complains when I am gone too long, as though I were neglecting him. When I am home he is on the computer with the tv on anyway so what difference does it make? She has a good size garden last year and I think this year there will be a couple more beds to work with. My youngest daughter wants to create a small butterfly garden, I bet their little one would want to participate too. Seems like it would be a nice place to set a chair by and relax.
Anyway, have a great rest of your week. I am hoping it goes by fast. I was to hear from the man about the apartment yesterday and since I didn't I am hoping to hear from him today. Cross your fingers for me!
I found this intriguing site through a friend's LiveJournal page. It is called Johari. When you go to the page I created for myself you will see a grid of personality traits. You chose 5 that you think pertain to me and click submit. You'll then be taken to a page that shows what I think of myself then what others think of me. http://kevan.org/johari?name=simplegirl
The opposite of that is Nohari. The same set-up applies only you will be given some more negative personality traits to choose from. It really opened my eyes just trying to limit myself to 6 negative traits and conversely I had a hard time finding 6 positive things about myself. People are so hard on themselves...http://kevan.org/nohari?name=simplegirl
When you're done you can create on for yourself!
|
Most of us look at our ideals, say how far we are from them, and get depressed. But it is heroic simply to say, "Here are my ideals," state them before the world, and then spend your life trying to live up to them. |
|
Keshavan Nair
|
QUESTION #1: Seven things I hope to do before I die:
QUESTION#2: Seven things I cannot do well:
QUESTION#3:Seven things that would attract me to my spouse: (Not that I am AT ALL interested in attracting one at this point...)
QUESTION#4: Seven things I say often:
QUESTION#5:Seven authors, books or series I love:
QUESTION#6:Seven movies I watch over and over again:
QUESTION#7:Seven people I want to do this:
The bane of my existence. I don't get them very often all things considering, only once a month and it lasts about three days usually. I can work through them and usually do. The pounding isolates itself to the right side of my head, the throbbing keeping pace with my pulse. I get a slightly upset stomach, noise bothers me and the light hurts my eyes. Well I went to bed Sunday knowing that it was coming. I wish that I had had something, a good tincture preferrably, to take on the onset but I didn't. I just went to bed knowing that I would have it when I woke up Monday morning. Well Monday morning dawns and who has a migraine? Yep. I came work, flinching anytime someone spoke loudly, walked slowly so as not to jar my head. I went home for a short lunch from 12-12:45 then promptly went home to lie down at 3. As my younger daughter read to me I dozed and when she was done my head was starting to feel better but by then it was time to get up and feed the troops. Chicken Pot Pie was rustled up with the leftover chicken from the weekend. I was sent to bed at 9, head still pounding. I had read that day that smelling lavender EO might soothe a headache so I rubbed some Lavender massage oil into my hands, held my hands onto my temples and breathed it in. I imagined my headache leaving my head and slowly it did. I woke up Tuesday with no headache! It is now Wednesday evening and though it has tried to come back a couple times it hasn't stayed. I am quite happy but now I am going to make an appointment with my Naturopath and the accunpuncturist in her office and see what we can do about not getting these every month. I see a huge diet and exercize change in my future!!
Lately I have felt a little guilty for not getting the things done that need doing. The television still has a little pull on me. Saturday evening I watched Love's Enduring Promise and Love's Long Journey back to back on the Hallmark channel. I know the movie wasn't focusing on the homesteading aspect and I sure wish they had shown more about that. Good movie all around though.
Saturday we took our sweet puppy to a friend's house to live. She is a Jack Russel Terrior and just too much for our house of folks at work or school or sleeping during the day. She would spend all night in her crate, be out for less than an hour in the morning, then go back in when we all left. She was very naughty most the time, chewing anything she could get ahold of including our cat. She dug up my whole back yard, dug all the dirt out of all my pots and still had pee-pee accidents on the floor. She just wasn't getting the attention she deserved and needed. I hope it works out....my friend has chickens that little Clementine is very interested in!
It is quite beautiful out where my friend lives, many trees, lots more space than we have here closer to the city. My friend HaphazardHomesteader and and I thinking of looking toward that direction for some land. We shall see.
I got up early before we took the puppy and baked a loaf of bread in the bread machine. I had been having troubles with the loaf not rising properly even though I was following the directions to the T. I read the jar of yeast and it says to use more than what the machine book tells me to use, it even says to use hotter water than the instruction book. I had much success with this loaf so apparently that is the way to go! I have a bunch of mixes from large Costco boxes for the bread machine, I plan to try to use those up then start playing on my own. I bought everything in bulk that I will need and will keep you all posted on my success. Later Saturday evening the kids and I made cinnamon roll dough but it came out a little different tasting. I followed the bread machine recipe but substituted a little whole wheat flour for the white flour. The taste is off but they are still okay. I made the glaze, powdered sugar and milk but it was not satisfying so this morning I used some vanilla frosting we had left over in the fridge, thinned it down with milk and used it on the top of the warmed cinnamon rolls. Much better! Lots of sugar though :(
I guess I can't fix everything at once!
I have been motivated by many of you here and for that I am thankful. I seem to have motivation issues, I could name off several reasons but at this point I think they are just excuses.
There are so many things I want to do with my life. I have grand plans. And often I get discouraged because many of them are so far fetched that they hardly seem possible. So I stop doing the little things I enjoy doing and I sacrifice my beliefs, needs and wants and settle. I am done settling. I am going to go out there and act as though I have the 50 acres I want and just do it, well to the extent I can renting a house with a little yard and helping my friend HaphazardHomesteader occasionally. You see, I have a husband at home that thinks my grand dreams are crazy and is content in front of the computer with the tv blaring. He considers himself a failure because we've been married for 10 years and we don't own our own home but doesn't do a thing to help out with anything. The kids have plenty of chores, to the extent I feel guilty about it, I do what I can but I work full time outside the home. Often my 12 year old, and she is the greatest by the way, will get dinner started if I leave out a recipe and have meat defrosted. Both the girls, I have an 8 year old also, love helping prepare meals and bake with me.
My husband works Wednesday through Friday nights and every other Saturday night. I hate to admit that I cherish those nights. I don't have to operate on his schedule, I can clean house without concern for him feeling neglected, the kids and I bake, clean, listen to music (often I don't allow the tv on until my 8 year old goes to bed at 9) and we generally enjoy each other's company. There is little yelling going on, with dad home there is much more grumbling.
I don't want to sound ungrateful, as though he isn't a good man because he is. I just think he isn't my good man. I think there is a different world out there for me that he isn't interested in sharing and I think that means I need to move on. Unfortunately it is going to be ugly and drawn out; the last arguement we had his statement was "I will not have another failed marriage" but I don't think this is something you'd call successful.
So last night I got home around 5:15, my older daughter had already cut the chicken for chicken strips and we baked those and made some mac & cheese. I cleaned up the kitchen, loaded the dishwasher and decided to bake some banana bread with some very brown bananas. (I use applesauce instead of shortening and this time I added a bunch of oats and extra applesauce.) It turned out so good! My mother called in the meantime, she talks and talks so I dusted the china hutch while I was listening to her. When I got off the phone I worked on the apron I am making. We did turn on the tv at 9, we watch Criminal Minds every Wednesday at 9.
I went to bed feeling like I had accomplished something. My house is still a mess but that I'll get caught up on tonight. I am sorry to be lengthy. I am just feeling grateful that I haven't really gotten lost, just took a little detour. I am back now and am determined not to live my life for my husband any more, I am going to live the kind of life I feel calling to me and raise my girls to understand that they are their own people, to live a life that makes them happy and hopefully in the process, find someone to share that happy life they have already created.
Thanks for listening. :)
I have been playing around with my blog; changing the template, trying to add the moon phases and a calendar but I can't seem to figure it out. I know to save the code for them but I can't figure out how to put them where I want on my blog! I wish I were a computer geek sometimes! Or at least knew how to read the instructions and understand them. They are like reading another language...
Is there a way to add stuff to the blank right hand side of my blog?
I spent some time sewing today at my friend HaphazardHomesteader's house. My machine is broken, AGAIN, and it is really starting to tick me off. I have an older Singer Futura, given to me by my mother who got it used. It is solidly built, so the man at the machine repair shop keeps telling me. This last time I think my lovely 12 year old got a bunch of thread caught under the bobbin caseing while trying to thread the bobbin. They charged me a sweet $80 to fix that then when I got it home and tried to thread a bobbin it won't work! I can sew with it but no go on needing a new bobbin threaded. So I took it in yesterday and, speaking very loudly so the other patron's of the establishment could hear me, voiced my displeasure with not having a machine this weekend when I brought it in last week to be fixed only to find that something else is now broken. I would think they would have tested threading a bobbin since that's what they were working on in the first place but apparantely that is too much to ask for.
My husband said he wants to be the one to pick it up tomorrow (it better be fixed tomorrow!) so he also can give them a piece of his mind. We have given this shop enough to have purchased a new machine! All I want is a simple machine to hem pants, sew some clothes for my family, make some purses and aprons, nothing fancy. They are now around $200 for a simple machine. I think I may buy one and keep the old one for back up.
I am making an apron with some old denim squares, a floral stripey print and a solid pink. It should be very cute, I will take a picture of it when I am done.
I never seem to get simple things like hemming my pants done. I have two kids that help out around the house, forced by a chore list, and a husband whose idea of helping is making more messes for me to clean up. So in essence I have three kids, one of them just happens to be in an adult's body. Sure does make house cleaning a chore. I have started making my own cleaners, with the help of the book Clean House Clean Planet by Karen Logan. There are many recipes for household cleaners and she talks about what are in commercial cleaners and the harm they can cause in your home and in the environment. I highly recommend this book.
(Wish me luck with the sewing machine. I wish I knew someone local that repaired them from their home....Also, do any of you recommend a brand or model in particular for simple sewing projects??)
Today I had a nice quiet day at work. Phones were quiet, the shop guys leave early so there was less tromping around in big work boots. The weather was brighter today and it seemed as though the sun was playing tag chasing the storms clouds and rain away:
I got the angle of the sun just right...one would never know this was taken from the parking lot of my work! I am so excited for spring! My mood was much improved today, I took a little walk outside and stood in the sun for a few minutes. I was reading something about how with the advent of SPF 10,000 (not really but you know what I mean) and dark sun glasses, even eye glasses with non-glare coating, people are becoming vitamin D deficient. So just take a supplement right?? We all know that the real thing is better whether from the sun or from food. I wish I could find that now.... Don't get me wrong. My skin is as white as it comes and I will use sunscreen if necessary but all we need is around 10-15 minutes a day in the sun with no sunscreen or glasses on for it to be effective. Unless your legs are straddling the equator itself I don't think that long will cause any damage. And anyway, it will brighten your mood!
I guess I needn't have worried.....
|
It is a wholesome and necessary thing for us to turn again to the earth and in the contemplation of her beauties to know of wonder and humility. |
|
Rachel Carson |
It's raining, no sunny, umm raining......SUN! Crap, rain. I swear Mother Nature's bi-polar disorder reared it's ugly head. I really do love the change in seasons. I especially love the change from cold and yucky to warm and pleasant but I realize that every season is necessary to create the beauty that surrounds me here in Oregon. But come on, the weather today was a bit much.
I am looking forward to spring; the warm sun on my shoulders, the chirp of the birds as I get ready for work, the shouts of kids playing in the neighborhood (as long as they aren't too loud), planting flowers and herbs.
Guess what?! I found some crocuses coming up next to the parking lot at my work! The small little thing, a dozen little starts not even an inch out of the ground, fighting their way through ice, wind and a bunch of rain (have you heard about the flooding going on around here??), fighting valiantly. Just a little life lesson for the day I suppose....
