Transplanted City Girl

• Thursday, May 11, 2006 - Of matchbox cars and conversations

Somehow, I never grew too old to race my little brothers around a "road rug" with matchbox cars.  We always had boxes and boxes of those fascinating toys, but I didn't realize how much fun they were until I discovered there is not one to be found in this entire family of boys!  I spent half a day searching through the trailer, and didn't find a single car I could drive aroudn my kitchen table.  Shocking!  When I pointed this gross irregularity out to my beloved husband, I was informed that this lack is because the Smith boys had access to yet another fascinating toy:  Hammers!  Alas, it appears any small cars he once owned have gone the way of all hammered things.  So much for fond memories to pass to his sons.  (Unless they find the hammers....) Well, I am determined to begin a collection for my sons.  Everytime we go to City Market then we pass this rack just full of them, for $0.98 each.  And every time I ask for one, and every time Chris convinces me to wait.  Lest you think I beg on hands and knees (only tried that once...) and am cruelly refused, it has become quite the joke between us, and we both ham it up to the fullest, with my "threats" getting more and more bizarre each time we leave the store empty handed.  But, last night, I got one!!!!!  Chris had decided he was taking me on a date  (yes, our date was to the grocery store) and as something extra special he bought me the purtiest blue race car!  It is steel-blue colored with these weird, neon-electric blue windows. First thing in the car: tear open my box and remove the car, thanking Chris profusely.  He announces that if it gets that reaction he'll have to get me more.  (Just what I was hoping for)  But in his innocence, he failed to take into account that girls simply do not treat their toys as its: this car needed an identity, a name.  After all, it is my first one!  And the car was promptly christened "Little Boy Blue."  Somehow Chris thought this was permanent proof of insanity.  No clue why. Well, with that out of the way, I simply had to drive LBB around for a while: across the dashboard, up Chris's arm... you get the picture.  And may I add that after years of practice, I have quite perfected the sound effects?   Anyone who has listened to two boys "vrooming" back and forth outside their door for hours on end can make the appropriate noises for expressing acceleration, speed, screeching brakes and let us not forget the crashing!  But I digress. Sarah:  "My car is faster then your car."  LBB is flying through the air towards the front of the real car. Chris:  "Watch it girl, thems fightin' words!" Sarah:  "It's true!" Well, it wasn't long before LBB was... talking!  You got it, he was talking!  I believe the conversation went something like this..... Chris:  "This is the limit."  Draws line across dash board.  "You stay on that side." LBB:  "Or what?" Chris:  "Or I have a very big hammer....." LBB:  "But then Sarah might cry!" Chris: "Then you better stay on your side."  Grins. (he's really not mean, you know) LBB retreats from the edge of the line and begins driving wildly around his now-limited area.  Three minutes later. Chris: trying to drive. "Car,"  somehow he nevers calls him Little Boy Blue!  "I think it is time for you to be good." LBB:  "Oh really?" Chris:  "Remember my hammer?" LBB:  "But I am a new car!  I don't know how to be good.  Maybe you should tell me." Chris:  "A good car will park in Sarah's pocket and not come out while I can see him." Laughing so hard she is almost crying, Sarah parks the car. Chris is laughing as well.  But later, in WalMart.... Chris is staring at hose nozzles on the shelf as Sarah stands behind him.  Somehow LBB leaves Sarah's pocket and drives slowly around, quietly chanting "He can't see me, he can't see...."  Dives back into pocket as Chris turns around. Chris:  "No way!  I don't believe it!" Sarah, oh so sweetly.  "What's wrong, honey?" Chris:  "Was that ungrateful vehicle just MOCKING me?" Sarah:  "No!  Never!" Chris:  "I think he was...."   Starts tickling poor Sarah and then continues on his way, muttering about hammers....... It was a hilarious evening, all thanks to LBB, which means ultimately to Chris.  I really do have the greatest husband in the world. I mean, any guy who buys his wife a matchbox car and lets her drive it all over him and the car?  And then tell him it's faster then his car?   It really made me miss my brothers, too.  Now LBB sits on top of the baby crib, awaiting the inevitable day when a minature Chris gets his first hammer.......

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